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Memoir writing process

Check Out Some Memoir Writing Classes

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Check Out Some Memoir Writing Classes
Having trouble getting started on your memoir? When you are assigned a memoir-related exercise or a certain number of pages, or if you’re expected to read your aloud to a group, you’re more likely to follow through on your own goals and deadlines. For that reason alone, a memoir class is valuable—and you just might learn how to write a memoir!
Just googling around, I found a few. This is not any sort of recommendation, since we do not have anything to do with these sites, but if you do sign up please leave a comment to let us know how you liked your experience.
It may be too late to sign up for the Tweetspeak workshop, which began yesterday and has a limit of 10 participants. It’s an online class priced at $420 for 12 weekly sessions or $350 for eight.
Gotham Writers’ Workshop offers a 10-week course for $399 plus a $25 registration fee. Beginning next week, new lectures will be posted every Tuesday, and you can access them at your convenience.
For $425, a 16-week online memoir writing class is available from The Memoir Club. This payment includes membership in the club, which has other benefits as well.
“Memoir specialist” Suzanne Sherman offers a variety of options and prices for online memoir writing sessions, including a one-day women’s workshop for just $85.
In addition, most colleges today offer online courses, so you might check the availability of a spot in any university’s online writing class. How about here at Write My Memoirs? Should we start an online memoir writing workshop?

Having trouble getting started on your memoir? When you are assigned a memoir-related exercise or a certain number of pages, or if you’re expected to read your work aloud to a group, you’re more likely to follow through on your own goals and deadlines. For that reason alone, a memoir class is valuable—and you just might learn how to write a memoir!

Just googling around, I found a few. This is not any sort of recommendation, since we do not have anything to do with these sites, but if you do sign up please leave a comment to let us know how you liked your experience.

  • It may be too late to sign up for the Tweetspeak workshop, which began yesterday and has a limit of 10 participants. It’s an online class priced at $420 for 12 weekly sessions or $350 for eight.
  • Gotham Writers’ Workshop offers a 10-week course for $399 plus a $25 registration fee. Beginning next week, new lectures will be posted every Tuesday, and you can access them at your convenience.
  • For $425, a 16-week online memoir writing class is available from The Memoir Writing Club. This payment includes membership in the club, which has other benefits as well.
  • “Memoir specialist” Suzanne Sherman offers a variety of options and prices for online memoir writing sessions, including a one-day women’s workshop for just $85.

In addition, most colleges today offer online courses, so you might check the availability of a spot in any university’s online writing class. How about here at Write My Memoirs? Should we start an online memoir writing workshop?

Memoirists: Can You Remain Anonymous?

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Memorists: Can You Remain Anonymous?
Lately at Write My Memoirs we’ve had customers wanting to publish their memoir with some level of anonymity. On the surface, this seems like a simple request—just publish under a pen name and, if you really want to hide, choose a pen name of the opposite sex.
But that takes you to the next decision. There seems to be no point in changing your name if all of the other people you talk about in your book have their real names. You can’t trace your parents’ heritage and then claim to be a stranger. Who else would write about your ancestry? Only you. So that means you’ll have to change all of the names in your book. If you think people might recognize the situations you’re describing, you’ll need to disguise your work further by changing the location and some of the details of what happened. After all of that, what have you accomplished? You’ve created a work of fiction.
As I see it, there’s no such thing as an anonymous memoir. You’re either telling your life story, or you’re writing a novel based on some events that actually took place. I don’t see much gray area between the two. People have lots of good reasons for wanting to publish an autobiography anonymously—usually because others involved in the story will be hurt or feel betrayed to see themselves in print. Sometimes authors even put their safety at risk when they publish. But the whole reason you want to write your memoir is to get your story told. There’s no way to do that honestly without attaching your name to your work.

Lately at Write My Memoirs we’ve had customers wanting to publish their memoir with some level of anonymity. On the surface, this seems like a simple request—just publish under a pen name and, if you really want to hide, choose a pen name of the opposite sex.

But that takes you to the next decision. There seems to be no point in changing your name if all of the other people you talk about in your book have their real names. You can’t trace your parents’ heritage and then claim to be a stranger. Who else would write about your ancestry? Only you. So that means you’ll have to change all of the names in your book. If you think people might recognize the situations you’re describing, you’ll need to disguise your work further by changing the location and some of the details of what happened. After all of that, what have you accomplished? You’ve created a work of fiction.

As I see it, there’s no such thing as an anonymous memoir. You’re either telling your life story, or you’re writing a novel based on some events that actually took place. I don’t see much gray area between the two. People have lots of good reasons for wanting to publish an autobiography anonymously—usually because others involved in the story will be hurt or feel betrayed to see themselves in print. Sometimes authors even put their safety at risk when they publish. But the whole reason you want to write your memoir is to get your story told. There’s no way to do that honestly without attaching your name to your work.

Procrastination: A Writer’s Enemy

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Procrastination: A Writer’s Enemy
Well, look at that date! It’s Friday, and this blog normally is updated every Tuesday. What happened? I got busy!
We’re all busy, and that’s never more evident than when you’re trying to maintain a writing routine. If you’re writing your memoirs, you’ve probably experienced a lapse at some point. Maybe you wrote every day for two weeks, and then you missed a day because you had to travel, or someone came to visit, or you needed to attend to a home repair—it doesn’t take much to derail a writing habit. Plus it’s February. This is the time of year for breaking all sorts of resolutions, whether it’s to exercise, diet or write. About six weeks into the year, your determination gets tested.
So what do you do if you’ve let your writing slide? You do what I did: get back to it. Yes, today is Friday instead of Tuesday, but who really cares? I could have just skipped this week altogether, but then when next Tuesday rolled around I’d be even more out of the blog habit, maybe be busy again and then I’d let it go another week and a new habit would be forming—a habit of not writing. No, the way to rerail the derail is to go back to that last piece you wrote, read it over, add a sentence and then add another sentence. Tomorrow, do the same. It’s fine to get off schedule and skip a day or a week. Forgive yourself! But you want to write your memoir, and as long as you’re thinking about it there’s no time like the present to just write.

Well, look at that date! It’s Friday, and this blog normally is updated every Tuesday. What happened? I got busy!

We’re all busy, and that’s never more evident than when you’re trying to maintain a writing routine. If you’re writing your memoirs, you’ve probably experienced a lapse at some point. Maybe you wrote every day for two weeks, and then you missed a day because you had to travel, or someone came to visit, or you needed to attend to a home repair—it doesn’t take much to derail a writing habit. Plus it’s February. This is the time of year for breaking all sorts of resolutions, whether it’s to exercise, diet or write. About six weeks into the year, your determination gets tested.

So what do you do if you’ve let your writing slide? You do what I did: get back to it. Yes, today is Friday instead of Tuesday, but who really cares? I could have just skipped this week altogether, but then when next Tuesday rolled around I’d be even more out of the blog habit; maybe I’d be busy again and then I’d let it go another week and a new habit would be forming—a habit of not writing. No, the way to rerail the derail is to go back to that last piece you wrote, read it over, add a sentence and then add another sentence. Tomorrow, do the same. It’s fine to get off schedule and skip a day or a week. Forgive yourself! But you want to write your memoir, and as long as you’re thinking about it there’s no time like the present to just write.

Why We’re Drawn To Biography, Part III

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Why We’re Drawn To Biography, Part III
In this blog arc, we’re exploring why nonfiction best-seller lists nearly always include, and are sometimes dominated by, biographies and autobiographies, and also why most of them focus on famous people. What’s there left to learn about a very famous person whose life unfolds daily in newspapers and magazines? Take Abraham Lincoln for example. In the past 150 years, hasn’t everything about him, and particularly his assassination, already been written? Yet today we still seem to be quite taken with our 16th president, as evidenced by Bill O’Reilley’s best-seller Killing Lincoln and the two 2012 movies Lincoln and Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (okay, perhaps that one is fiction). Other names on the best-seller list—Winston Churchill, Joseph Kennedy, Bruce Springsteen—what are we still hoping to learn about them we don’t already know?
Secrets! We’d like to know the “real” story behind some action or development, or we’re hoping to hear a confession about how someone felt about someone else, or we want to know a little tidbit never before revealed. Certainly someone writing a memoir will share with us some deep, dark secret; exposing a love affair is a popular choice.
Sometimes it’s just about the point of view. No matter how much has been written about a fascinating person, when a different author tackles the familiar material there’s bound to be a nugget of something new in the biography. And when the book is a memoir, we can be sure we’ve never before heard the story from that point of view.

In this blog arc, we’re exploring why nonfiction best-seller lists nearly always include, and are sometimes dominated by, biographies and autobiographies, and also why most of them focus on famous people. What’s left to learn about a very famous person whose life unfolds daily in newspapers and magazines? Take Abraham Lincoln for example. In the past 150 years, hasn’t everything about him, and particularly his assassination, already been written? Yet today we still seem to be quite taken with our 16th president, as evidenced by Bill O’Reilley’s best-seller Killing Lincoln and the two 2012 movies Lincoln and Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (okay, perhaps that one is fiction). Other names on the best-seller list—Winston Churchill, Joseph Kennedy, Bruce Springsteen—what are we still hoping to learn about them we don’t already know?

Secrets! We’d like to know the “real” story behind some action or development, or we’re hoping to hear a confession about how someone felt about someone else, or we want to know a little tidbit never before revealed. Certainly someone writing a memoir will share with us some deep, dark secret; exposing a love affair is a popular choice.

Sometimes it’s just about the point of view. No matter how much has been written about a fascinating person, when a different author tackles the familiar material there’s bound to be a nugget of something new in the biography. And when the book is a memoir, we can be sure we’ve never before heard the story from that point of view.

How Will You Feel a Year From Now?

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Old Thoughts for a New Year
Let’s start the year off with some platitudes. Here’s one, since today is not only the first day of 2013, but also: Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Hey, it’s true, right? What are you going to do with the rest of your life? Whatever it is, you might as well start today.
Here’s another one, reportedly said by inspirational author Karen Lamb: A year from now you will wish you had started today. As one year turns to another, we tend to tally up what we accomplished during the past year and which goals we never did achieve. We also set new goals for the coming year, or we refocus on goals we haven’t completed.
If you have ever wanted to write your memoir, we here at WriteMyMemoirs are your biggest cheerleaders. It doesn’t matter whether this is a brand new goal for you or one you’ve tried to set in the past. It doesn’t matter whether you have written entire chapters or not yet one word. You can start this very day. Write one paragraph about who you are or what happened on a particular day in your life. Just put down something. Then write a little more tomorrow, or maybe just look over what you wrote today and sharpen it a little. If it’s perfect, even better! Reading it over will motivate you to add another paragraph. Keep that going and you’ll feel pretty great one year from now when you see your memoir all finished. But if you brush it aside, you know what will happen: A year from now you will wish you had started today.

Let’s start the year off with some platitudes. Here’s one, since today is not only the first day of 2013, but also: Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Hey, it’s true, right? What are you going to do with the rest of your life? Whatever it is, you might as well start today.

Here’s another one, reportedly said by inspirational author Karen Lamb: A year from now you will wish you had started today. As one year turns to another, we tend to tally up what we accomplished during the past year and which goals we never did achieve. We also set new goals for the coming year, or we refocus on goals we haven’t completed.

If you have ever wanted to write your memoir, we here at WriteMyMemoirs are your biggest cheerleaders. It doesn’t matter whether this is a brand new goal for you or one you’ve tried to set in the past. It doesn’t matter whether you have written entire chapters or not yet one word. You can start this very day. Write one paragraph about who you are or what happened on a particular day in your life. Just put down something. Then write a little more tomorrow, or maybe just look over what you wrote today and sharpen it a little. If it’s perfect, even better! Reading it over will motivate you to add another paragraph. Keep that going and you’ll feel pretty great one year from now when you see your memoir all finished. But if you brush it aside, you know what will happen: A year from now you will wish you had started today.

12/12/12: Mystical Day to Start a Memoir

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While some believe that today’s date signifies the end of the world, many view a repetitive date like December 12, 2012—12/12/12—as good luck. Wednesday is not normally a popular day for weddings, but today you’ll be hearing wedding bells everywhere. As one bride explained, “I figured my husband would never forget our anniversary.”
I’m shamelessly jumping on the bandwagon to propose that 12/12/12 is the perfect day to begin writing a memoir. You’ll easily track how long it’s taking you, and you’ll begin a new year with a long-desired project already underway so there will be no need to put it on your resolutions list for a change. It’s so close to the holidays that—let’s be honest—you’re not getting much work done anyway. You might as well turn your energies toward outlining your memoir chapters or writing up your first anecdote.
One website that addresses this mystical date challenges us to begin something big on this day: “What new seed you plant, and in what soil, is now up to you. What seeds will you plant at the gateway to flourish on your new fertile soil as you walk into the threshold of your new world? Be in a place that you feel is, or will be, a gateway place for you on December 12. The gateway for you may be to face a fear, or it may be a place that encourages you to come into a new power. It may be a place that you feel you can reconcile and bring new truth to the past. Perhaps it is a place that needs transformation and you will go to aid in that for the location, and for your soul.” Sounds like the perfect day to sit down and start your memoir, doesn’t it?

While some believe that today’s date signifies the end of the world, many view a repetitive date like December 12, 2012—12/12/12—as good luck. Wednesday is not normally a popular day for weddings, but today you’ll be hearing wedding bells everywhere. As one bride explained, “I figured my husband would never forget our anniversary.”

I’m shamelessly jumping on the bandwagon to propose that 12/12/12 is the perfect day to begin writing a memoir. You’ll easily track how long it’s taking you, and you’ll begin a new year with a long-desired project already underway so there will be no need to put it on your resolutions list for a change. It’s so close to the holidays that—let’s be honest—you’re not getting much work done anyway. You might as well turn your energies toward outlining your memoir chapters or writing up your first anecdote.

One website that addresses this mystical date challenges us to begin something big on this day: “What new seed you plant, and in what soil, is now up to you. What seeds will you plant at the gateway to flourish on your new fertile soil as you walk into the threshold of your new world? Be in a place that you feel is, or will be, a gateway place for you on December 12. The gateway for you may be to face a fear, or it may be a place that encourages you to come into a new power. It may be a place that you feel you can reconcile and bring new truth to the past. Perhaps it is a place that needs transformation and you will go to aid in that for the location, and for your soul.” Sounds like the perfect day to sit down and start your memoir, doesn’t it?

Some Final Tasks Before You Write Your Memoir

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Some Final Tasks Before You Write Your Memoir
In this last of a series of blog posts suggesting you try some assignments detailed in a syllabus for a university-level memoir writing course, I recommend you follow the syllabus’s direction to read other people’s memoirs along with at least one biography. By reading about people’s lives—accounts both by the people themselves and by their biographers—you can learn a lot about structuring a life story, observe effective ways to write description and dialogue, identify interesting topics to pursue and determine how much detail to include in your own memoir.
After you’ve read other memoirs and you’ve completed the writing assignments outlined here in earlier blog posts, try writing what the syllabus calls “reflection papers.” The idea is to reflect upon one of the memoirs you’ve read or upon your own writing so far in the “class.”
The course’s final assignment is to put together a portfolio of your best writing for the class. This is not necessary, since you’re not actually taking the course. However, the portfolio is to be accompanied by a two- or three-page introduction addressing themes that surfaced in your writing, insights you’ve picked up about yourself, specific ways your writing improved and what you now “believe about a writer’s ability to truthfully convey his or her experiences through words.” I hope you’ve enjoyed taking this virtual college memoir writing course!

In this last of a series of blog posts suggesting you try some assignments detailed in a syllabus for a university-level memoir writing course, I recommend you follow the syllabus’s direction to read other people’s memoirs along with at least one biography. By reading about people’s lives—accounts both by the people themselves and by their biographers—you can learn a lot about structuring a life story, observe effective ways to write description and dialogue, identify interesting topics to pursue and determine how much detail to include in your own memoir.

After you’ve read other memoirs and you’ve completed the writing assignments outlined here in earlier blog posts, try writing what the syllabus calls “reflection papers.” The idea is to reflect upon one of the memoirs you’ve read or upon your own writing so far in the “class.”

The course’s final assignment is to put together a portfolio of your best writing for the class. This is not necessary, since you’re not actually taking the course. However, the portfolio is to be accompanied by a two- or three-page introduction addressing themes that surfaced in your writing, insights you’ve picked up about yourself, specific ways your writing improved and what you now “believe about a writer’s ability to truthfully convey his or her experiences through words.” I hope you’ve enjoyed taking this virtual college memoir writing course!

More Assignments to Prep for Writing Your Memoir

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More Assignments to Prep for Writing Your Memoir
Continuing with the syllabus we introduced in an earlier blog post for a college course in writing memoirs, we come to the next assignment—actually the next two assignments, since they both involve writing a biographical essay. These assignments will accomplish dual goals. First, they will give you practice in writing about someone else’s life before you attempt to write about your own. Second, you could very well end up including parts or all of these essays in your own memoir.
In both essays, you should choose someone you have known personally for a long time. The first essay will zoom in on the relationship you have with that person, who is likely to be a close relative or friend. Explain how your relationship has changed over time. You may find that you’re writing as much about yourself as about the subject of the essay, and that’s okay.
Select a different person for the second essay, which should more directly focus on the subject’s life. A grandparent is a great choice for this essay. Write 5-7 pages about the person as if you’re writing a classic biography. If the person is alive and accessible, you can interview him or her; you also can interview other people who have known the person. Through this exercise, you’ll discover that even a quiet life can make for interesting reading. It will help you to figure out what to write about yourself when you tackle your memoir.

Continuing with the syllabus we introduced in an earlier blog post for a college course in writing memoirs, we come to the next assignment—actually the next two assignments, since they both involve writing a biographical essay. These assignments will accomplish dual goals. First, they will give you practice in writing about someone else’s life before you attempt to write about your own. Second, you could very well end up including parts or all of these essays in your own memoir.

In both essays, you should choose someone you have known personally for a long time. The first essay will zoom in on the relationship you have with that person, who is likely to be a close relative or friend. Explain how your relationship has changed over time. You may find that you’re writing as much about yourself as about the subject of the essay, and that’s okay.

Select a different person for the second essay, which should more directly focus on the subject’s life. A grandparent is a great choice for this essay. Write 5-7 pages about the person as if you’re writing a classic biography. If the person is alive and accessible, you can interview him or her; you also can interview other people who have known the person. Through this exercise, you’ll discover that even a quiet life can make for interesting reading. It will help you to figure out what to write about yourself when you tackle your memoir.

Taking Your Memoir Journal to the Next Step

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Taking Your Memoir Journal to the Next Step
In our last blog post, we introduced an actual syllabus from a university’s memoir-writing course. The first assignment was to write a journal. After you’ve been writing one for a while, you can tackle the course’s next assignment: write three “autobiographical essays” based on memories you’ve documented in your journal.
The syllabus describes these essays as each capturing “a turning point, a memorable event [or] a moment that exemplifies your life in its totality.” The suggested length of each essay is a minimum of four to five pages but no maximum—write as much as you need in order to provide a full description. “Include vivid details that draw the reader into your experience,” the syllabus instructs, adding that you should “provide a sense of what the experience meant to you (although you should not write ‘this is what I learned’ conclusions).”
At Write My Memoirs, we advise doing this very same thing—although instead of limiting yourself to three essays, we recommend writing up as many of your experiences as you need to fill out your life story. You can build an entire memoir upon a series of episodes; in fact, that’s really what a memoir is. It’s an account of moments in your life, how you reacted and what happened as a result. So, instead of considering these as essays, you can regard them each as a chapter of your final memoir. There’s still more to come next time!

In our last Write My Memoirs blog post, we introduced an actual syllabus from a university’s memoir-writing course. The first assignment was to keep a journal. After you’ve been writing one for a while, you can tackle the course’s next assignment: write three “autobiographical essays” based on memories you’ve documented in your journal.

The syllabus describes these essays as each capturing “a turning point, a memorable event [or] a moment that exemplifies your life in its totality.” The suggested length of each essay is a minimum of four to five pages but no maximum—write as much as you need in order to provide a full description. “Include vivid details that draw the reader into your experience,” the syllabus instructs, adding that you should “provide a sense of what the experience meant to you (although you should not write ‘this is what I learned’ conclusions).”

At Write My Memoirs, we advise doing this very same thing—although instead of limiting yourself to three essays, we recommend writing up as many of your experiences as you need to fill out your life story. You can build an entire memoir upon a series of episodes; in fact, that’s really what a memoir is. It’s an account of moments in your life, how you reacted and what happened as a result. So, instead of considering these as essays, you can regard them each as a chapter of your final memoir. There’s still more to come next time!

Before You Write Your Memoir: Exercises to Prepare

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Before You Write Your Memoir: Exercises to Help You
As part of her own memoir writing process, author Shirley Hershey Showalter has been keeping a blog. For one entry, Shirley had received permission from her friend, Professor Melanie Springer Mock, to post the syllabus for a university-level memoir-writing class that Mock was teaching at George Fox University in Oregon. I think you’ll find some of the assignments from this course relevant in helping an amateur writer craft a heartfelt memoir.
The first assignment Mock gives her students is to keep a journal. We’ve talked about that here at Write My Memoirs before. Mock calls journaling “the most democratic literary form,” because everyone has a life story from which to draw, and we all own our stories. Adding that journaling also is “perhaps the most fundamental form of life writing,” Mock expresses the hope that her students will enjoy the journaling process enough to continue with it after the course ends. To guide the students in productive journaling, the syllabus advises:
“A fruitful journal will include more than a summarization of weather and what you had for lunch, although you may write about that as well. Consider using your journal to record daily events, conversations and feelings; to examine your beliefs and thoughts, as well as your reaction to certain daily experiences; to experiment with different writing styles and ideas; and to draft pieces you are working on.” I think those are good suggestions. More assignments next time—check back here next week!

As part of her own memoir writing process, author Shirley Hershey Showalter has been keeping a blog. For one entry, Shirley received permission from her friend, Professor Melanie Springer Mock, to post the syllabus for a university-level memoir-writing class that Mock was teaching at George Fox University in Oregon. I think you’ll find some of the assignments from this course relevant in helping an amateur writer craft a heartfelt memoir.

The first assignment Mock gives her students is to keep a journal. We’ve talked about that here at Write My Memoirs before. Mock calls journaling “the most democratic literary form,” because everyone has a life story from which to draw, and we all own our stories. Adding that journaling also is “perhaps the most fundamental form of life writing,” Mock expresses the hope that her students will enjoy the journaling process enough to continue with it after the course ends. To guide the students in productive journaling, the syllabus advises:

“A fruitful journal will include more than a summarization of weather and what you had for lunch, although you may write about that as well. Consider using your journal to record daily events, conversations and feelings; to examine your beliefs and thoughts, as well as your reaction to certain daily experiences; to experiment with different writing styles and ideas; and to draft pieces you are working on.” I think those are good suggestions. More assignments next time—check back here next week!

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Then just set up a chapter and start writing your memoir. Don’t worry about rules. There are no rules to writing your memoir; there are only trends. These trends are based on techniques and features identified in current top-selling memoirs. At best, they’re the flavor of the month. If you’re capturing your life in print for your family, for your own gratification or to inspire readers, rather than aiming to set off Hollywood screenplay bidding wars, these trends don’t even apply to you. You’ll write the memoir that suits you best, and it will be timeless, not trend-driven.There are no rules, but there are four steps:

1. Theme/framework
2. Writing
3. Editing/polishing
4. Self-publishing

You’ve researched this, too, and you’ve been shocked at the price for getting help with any one of those steps, much less all four. That’s because most memoir sites promise to commercialize your work. They’ll follow a formula based on current memoir trends, because they want to convince you that they can turn your memoir into a best-seller. These sites overwhelm you with unnecessary information not to help you, the memoir author, but to address Search Engine Optimization (SEO) algorithms so they can sell more.

That’s not what we do at Write My Memoirs. Our small community of coaches, writers and editors are every bit as skilled as any you’ll find, and we charge appropriately for their expertise and the time they’ll spend helping you craft a compelling, enjoyable read. But you won’t pay an upcharge for other websites’ commercialization, the marketing that follows, and the pages of intimidating “advice.” You can sell your book if you like—we have ISBNs available for you—but our organic process of capturing your story takes a noncommercial path.

If you want help with any or all of the four steps above, choose from our services or save money by selecting one of our packages. If you’d like to talk about what’s right for you, schedule a call. One year from now, you can be holding your published memoir in your hand. And at that point, it will be a big deal!

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