Even though you’re probably kidding when you refer to the “horror story” that is your memoir, it’s worth checking out this advice.
When I came across Stephen King’s 20 tips for writers, I thought they’d probably be apt for memoir authors, not just writers of horror and other fiction. Many do apply, although some are just obvious suggestions you’ve heard over and over, which kind of surprised me. Let’s look at them one by one, ten this time and ten the next time. My comments follow each tip.
- First write for yourself, and then worry about the audience.
There’s really no other way to write. Only when you have something tangible can you try to view it as a reader who’s coming to your story for the first time. On a first draft, if you’re not pleasing yourself, or if you don’t feel accomplished after writing it, you’ll never finish this book. Stephen King is right: please yourself first. - Don’t use passive voice.
Never? That’s an extreme position. There’s plenty of room in your book for a bit of passive voice. Think of ’Twas the night before Christmas….The stockings were hung by the chimney with care. Could you improve the poem by saying The children hung their stockings by the chimney with care? No. Sometimes passive voice is the better voice, even if not all that often. - Avoid adverbs. “The adverb is not your friend.”
Well, right, more or less. It’s not that you can’t describe the how or when, but using an adverb is kind of lazy and, worse, the adverb reflects your own impression of the action rather than leaving that to the reader to decide. Here’s an example: She graciously offered me some tea. That’s easy! You tell the reader how the gesture was made—graciously—so you’re finished with that image. That’s what I mean when I say it’s lazy. Instead, let the reader get the feel of that gracious gesture: As she offered me some tea, she touched me lightly on my arm. I knew it was long past tea time and appreciated that she would go to the trouble of making me a cup so late in the day. All of that says “gracious.” And I know what you’re thinking—while eliminating “graciously” I added “lightly,” just another unwanted adverb. This is the problem with taking an extreme position and then refusing to break the “rule.” Still, be careful when you do. - Avoid adverbs, especially after “he said” and “she said.”
Nothing sounds more like high school writing than: “I wish you still lived here,” he said wistfully. Again, instead of giving into the urge to describe how he said it, supply the reader with more information—more show, less tell. “I wish you still lived here,” he said, looking out toward the setting sun. The reader understands the “wistful” aspect. - Don’t obsess over perfect grammar.
Um, you don’t have to obsess over perfect grammar as long as, eventually, some editor does. We don’t speak with perfect grammar, so it’s not easy to develop your authentic writer’s voice that has, I’ll call it, close-to-perfect grammar. But it will make a better book if the narration—not the dialogue, where anything goes—is grammatically correct. So while I agree that you shouldn’t pay grammar so much attention that it distracts you from writing fluidly, at some point you still have to address the grammar. - The magic is in you.
About this point, Stephen King says, “I’m convinced that fear is at the root of most bad writing.” I’ve edited a lot of work by nonprofessional writers, and if the content is interesting, the writing comes from the heart, and the writer’s voice is consistent, the magic is there. Sometimes it needs digging through some weeds to find it, and it always needs editing, but it’s usually there. So yes, feel confident that the magic is in you. - Read, read, read.
This is essential. You have to get into a writing rhythm and specifically a memoir writing rhythm. So go read some memoirs! And read fiction, read narrative history, read classic literature. Other authors will influence you. You’ll learn options in structure, patterns of dialogue, and methods in describing scenes and scenery. There’s really no way around it no matter how much talent you have. - Don’t worry about making other people happy.
No rule applies to memoir authors more than this one. You have to write your truth. You can’t worry about hurting the feelings of people you name or obscurely refer to in your book. As for the general readership, you want readers to recommend your book, but that doesn’t mean you want your book to make them happy. You just want them to enjoy the experience of reading about your life even if “happy” is nowhere in the process. - Turn off the TV.
I guess so? Who tries to write a memoir while watching TV? If you’re following a football game while writing chapter five, you are not disciplined enough to write a serious book. I think we all know this. - You have three months.
This is astonishing! We are not all Stephen-King-level writers. Just about no one is. Maybe three months for a rough first draft of fiction is possible for a full-time, professional writer spending at least 40 hours a week on it. But for you? There’s no time limit, really. You may not be watching football while you’re writing, but you probably have a job and maybe a family and other obligations. This is your memoir. Take the time you need to get it right.
Check back in two weeks for the next ten Stephen King tips!