Rosanne Ullman

Rosanne Ullman owns Write My Memoirs (writemymemoirs.com) to help people write and self-publish their life stories and co-owns Home Memoir (homememoir.com) to help people capture, in a coffee-table book, the love they have for their home. For 20 years, Rosanne taught grammar at a local adult education program, New Trier eXtention, and that well-received course is the basis for the Write My Memoirs Grammar and Writing Course. Rosanne has a long freelance career writing for and about various industries, particularly the professional beauty industry. Her observations about life appear frequently on various blog sites and include regular contributions to Sixty and Me (sixtyandme.com) and Boomer Cafe (boomercafe.com). Rosanne also is the author of the children’s picture book The Case of the Disappearing Kisses. She holds a Master’s degree in Journalism (MSJ) from Northwestern University’s famed Medill School of Journalism.

Aiming Your Memoir at a Young Audience?

June 24, 2018April 30, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Aiming Your Memoir at a Young Audience?

“Brutally attacked by rebel soldiers who cut off both her hands….” That’s the beginning of a synopsis of The Bite of the Mango by Miratu Kamara, a book included on About.com’s list of biographies, autobiographies and memoirs for teens. Apparently teens are a tough bunch these days. Other books on the list relate the lives of a drug smuggling gone horribly wrong, teenagers on death row, a “boy soldier” in Sierre Leone and, perhaps most famous, a young surfer whose arm was chewed off by a shark.

If you believe that your memoir has something to offer young people, there’s no need to sugar-coat your life’s experiences. Write your story in words a 14-year-old can understand. Try to keep it under 300 pages. Don’t overplay the graphic detail involving violence or sex. Present it in a way that there’s a lesson they can take away—that’s probably the hardest requirement. School libraries and the young people’s sections of public libraries will carry your book if it strikes the librarians as “powerful” in painting the picture of a series of events and in delivering a message.

Without a message, the story of your life is a narrative that will resonate only with the people who know you. If you think you have something of value to teach to young people who will be inspired to follow in your footsteps, or the opposite—will be able to avoid making the same mistakes you made—write with those teens in mind.

http://childrensbooks.about.com/od/5youngadultbooks/tp/contemporary-biographies-autobiographies-memoirs-for-teens.htm

“Brutally attacked by rebel soldiers who cut off both her hands….” That’s the beginning of a synopsis of The Bite of the Mango by Miratu Kamara, a book included on About.com’s list of biographies, autobiographies and memoirs for teens. Apparently teens are a tough bunch these days. Other books on the list relate the lives of a drug smuggling gone horribly wrong, teenagers on death row, a “boy soldier” in Sierre Leone and, perhaps most famous, a young surfer whose arm was chewed off by a shark.

If you believe that your memoir has something to offer young people, there’s no need to sugar-coat your life’s experiences. Write your story in words a 14-year-old can understand. Try to keep it under 300 pages. Don’t overplay the graphic detail involving violence or sex. Present it in a way that there’s a lesson they can take away—that’s probably the hardest requirement. School libraries and the young people’s sections of public libraries will carry your book if it strikes the librarians as “powerful” in painting the picture of a series of events and in delivering a message.

Boil It Down: The Food Memoir

June 24, 2018April 25, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Boil It Down: The Food Memoir

If you’re writing a memoir but finding yourself rambling without a narrative focus, you may want to jump on the food memoir bandwagon. Food memoirs are becoming so commonplace that the Literary Foodie blogger lists several hundred you might be interested in reading. Among the most popular are Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential; Blood, Bones & Butter, by Gabrielle Hamilton, Julie Powell’s book-to-movie Julie and Julia and Julia Child’s own My Life in France; Beaten, Seared and Sauced, by Jonathan Dixon; A Year in Provence, by Peter Mayle and Tender at the Bone: Growing Up at the Table, by Ruth Reichl.

But let’s talk about you. If you’re not a celebrity chef or even a good cook, why might you want to write a food memoir?

We all eat, so food is something that draws in the reader. It’s multisensory; you can describe the look, texture, smell and taste. And it’s a memory trigger. We may be more likely to remember what we ate on a certain night at our favorite restaurant than who was in our company that evening. Everyone has dishes they associate with growing up, romances, routines, special dates and general indulging. By calling upon that aspect of your memory cache, you provide a focus and establish a consistent thread for your memoir. As an underlying theme, food can be symbolic, the topic lends itself to humor and a food memoir is the perfect vehicle if you want to write only about a limited period of your life.

http://literaryfoodie.blogspot.com/p/food-memoir-list.html

If you’re writing a memoir but finding yourself rambling without a narrative focus, you may want to jump on the food memoir bandwagon. Food memoirs are becoming so commonplace that the Literary Foodie blogger lists several hundred you might be interested in reading. Among the most popular are Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential; Blood, Bones & Butter, by Gabrielle Hamilton, Julie Powell’s book-to-movie Julie and Julia and Julia Child’s own My Life in France; Beaten, Seared and Sauced, by Jonathan Dixon; A Year in Provence, by Peter Mayle and Tender at the Bone: Growing Up at the Table, by Ruth Reichl.

But let’s talk about you. If you’re not a celebrity chef or even a good cook, why might you want to write a food memoir?

We all eat, so food is something that draws in the reader. It’s multisensory; you can describe the look, texture, smell and taste. And it’s a memory trigger. We may be more likely to remember what we ate on a certain night at our favorite restaurant than who was in our company that evening. We all have dishes we associate with growing up, romances, routines, special life events and general indulging. By calling upon that aspect of your memory cache, you provide a focus and establish a consistent thread for your memoir. As an underlying theme, food can be symbolic, the topic lends itself to humor and a food memoir is the perfect vehicle if you want to write only about a limited period of your life.

Try Garner’s as a Reference for Grammar and Usage

June 24, 2018April 17, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Try Garner’s American Usage as a Reference

So many questions about grammar cannot be answered simply yes/no, either/or. While we tend to think of grammar as cut-and-dried, it’s really more of a reflection of preferred usage at this moment in time—preferred rather than absolutely correct, and only at this moment because a living language is constantly changing. So a grammatical construction you learned in school 40 years ago may be less valid today. That’s less valid, not exactly wrong. Also, word choice, usage and even punctuation vary widely depending on your geography. Each English-speaking country seems to have its own rules.

For all of those reasons, for American writing I like a usage guide that’s not on everyone’s radar: Garner’s American Usage. Most people rely on a stylebook such as the AP Stylebook or the Chicago Manual of Style, or a dictionary like Webster’s or American Heritage. But unlike those references, which provide right-or-wrong information, Garner’s Modern American Usage includes the immensely helpful and sensible “Garner’s Language-Change Index,” a five-stage continuum of acceptability ranging from unacceptable to commonly preferred. Garner’s also is a fun read, adding information about the language and elaborating its points with humor.

A review by School Library Journal published on the Oxford University Press website calls Garner’s “the best of its kind in that it simply reports the facts in an engaging way; language evolves and usage changes. An invaluable ready-reference tool.”

http://www.amazon.com/Garners-Modern-American-Usage-Garner/dp/0195382757/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1366214307&sr=8-1&keywords=garner%27s+modern+american+usage

http://www.oup.com/us/catalog/general/subject/Reference/EnglishUsageGuides/?view=usa&ci=9780195382754

So many questions about grammar cannot be answered simply yes/no, either/or. While we tend to think of grammar as cut-and-dried, it’s really more of a reflection of preferred usage at this moment in time—preferred rather than absolutely correct, and only at this moment because a living language is constantly changing. So a grammatical construction you learned in school 40 years ago may be less valid today. That’s less valid, not exactly wrong. Also, word choice, usage and even punctuation vary widely depending on your geography. Each English-speaking country seems to have its own rules.

For all of those reasons, for American memoir writing I like a usage guide that’s not on everyone’s radar: Garner’s American Usage. Most people rely on a stylebook such as the AP Stylebook or the Chicago Manual of Style, or a dictionary like Webster’s or American Heritage. But unlike those references, which gauge each case as right or wrong, Garner’s Modern American Usage includes the immensely helpful and sensible “Garner’s Language-Change Index,” a five-stage continuum of acceptability ranging from unacceptable to commonly preferred. Garner’s also is a fun read, adding information about the language and elaborating its points with humor.

A review by School Library Journal published on the Oxford University Press website calls Garner’s “the best of its kind in that it simply reports the facts in an engaging way; language evolves and usage changes. An invaluable ready-reference tool.”

Keep a “Quotes Journal” as a Memoir Resource

June 24, 2018April 9, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Keep a “Quotes Journal” as a Memoir Resource

A lot of people like to include dialogue in their memoirs. It breaks up the copy visually and makes the reading more interesting by really bringing a situation to life. But dialogue can be difficult to write, and that’s not the only problem.

When you relate a conversation, you’re putting quotes around not just your own words, but someone else’s words. You can rely on your memory to paraphrase what happened in a scene you write about, and in a memoir you do the best you can. But there seems to be a higher standard of accuracy in quoting directly, and you can’t possibly remember a conversation word for word even when you are one of the participants or you witness the discussion; you can’t possibly know exactly what was said if you weren’t even present.

If you’re still some years away from writing your memoir, begin now to keep what I call a “quotes journal” of things people say to you that you want to remember precisely. Perhaps it’s the “wise sayings” your mother likes to repeat as advice to you. Maybe it’s a particularly poignant conversation you had with someone. Or, when you experience a traumatic event, it’s interesting to write down all of the comments people make about that occurrence. Their words provide insight into their character as well as into your relationship with them. When you go to write your memoir, you’ll find your quotes journal very helpful.

A lot of people like to include dialogue in their memoirs. It breaks up the copy visually and makes the reading more interesting by really bringing a situation to life. But dialogue can be difficult to write, and that’s not the only problem.

If you’re still some years away from writing your memoir, begin now to keep what I call a “quotes journal” of things people say to you that you want to remember precisely. Perhaps it’s the “wise sayings” your mother likes to repeat as advice to you. Maybe it’s a particularly poignant conversation you had with someone. Or, when you experience a traumatic event, it’s interesting to write down all of the comments people make about that occurrence. Their words provide insight into their character as well as into your relationship with them. When you do begin to write your memoir, you’ll find your quotes journal very helpful.

Check Out Some Memoir Writing Classes

June 24, 2018April 2, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Check Out Some Memoir Writing Classes

Having trouble getting started on your memoir? When you are assigned a memoir-related exercise or a certain number of pages, or if you’re expected to read your aloud to a group, you’re more likely to follow through on your own goals and deadlines. For that reason alone, a memoir class is valuable—and you just might learn how to write a memoir!

Just googling around, I found a few. This is not any sort of recommendation, since we do not have anything to do with these sites, but if you do sign up please leave a comment to let us know how you liked your experience.

It may be too late to sign up for the Tweetspeak workshop, which began yesterday and has a limit of 10 participants. It’s an online class priced at $420 for 12 weekly sessions or $350 for eight.

Gotham Writers’ Workshop offers a 10-week course for $399 plus a $25 registration fee. Beginning next week, new lectures will be posted every Tuesday, and you can access them at your convenience.

For $425, a 16-week online memoir writing class is available from The Memoir Club. This payment includes membership in the club, which has other benefits as well.

“Memoir specialist” Suzanne Sherman offers a variety of options and prices for online memoir writing sessions, including a one-day women’s workshop for just $85.

In addition, most colleges today offer online courses, so you might check the availability of a spot in any university’s online writing class. How about here at Write My Memoirs? Should we start an online memoir writing workshop?

Having trouble getting started on your memoir? When you are assigned a memoir-related exercise or a certain number of pages, or if you’re expected to read your work aloud to a group, you’re more likely to follow through on your own goals and deadlines. For that reason alone, a memoir class is valuable—and you just might learn how to write a memoir!

It may be too late to sign up for the Tweetspeak workshop, which began yesterday and has a limit of 10 participants. It’s an online class priced at $420 for 12 weekly sessions or $350 for eight.
Gotham Writers’ Workshop offers a 10-week course for $399 plus a $25 registration fee. Beginning next week, new lectures will be posted every Tuesday, and you can access them at your convenience.
For $425, a 16-week online memoir writing class is available from The Memoir Writing Club. This payment includes membership in the club, which has other benefits as well.
“Memoir specialist” Suzanne Sherman offers a variety of options and prices for online memoir writing sessions, including a one-day women’s workshop for just $85.

In addition, most colleges today offer online courses, so you might check the availability of a spot in any university’s online writing class. How about here at Write My Memoirs? Should we start an online memoir writing workshop?

Memoirists: Can You Remain Anonymous?

June 24, 2018March 27, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Memorists: Can You Remain Anonymous?

Lately at Write My Memoirs we’ve had customers wanting to publish their memoir with some level of anonymity. On the surface, this seems like a simple request—just publish under a pen name and, if you really want to hide, choose a pen name of the opposite sex.

But that takes you to the next decision. There seems to be no point in changing your name if all of the other people you talk about in your book have their real names. You can’t trace your parents’ heritage and then claim to be a stranger. Who else would write about your ancestry? Only you. So that means you’ll have to change all of the names in your book. If you think people might recognize the situations you’re describing, you’ll need to disguise your work further by changing the location and some of the details of what happened. After all of that, what have you accomplished? You’ve created a work of fiction.

As I see it, there’s no such thing as an anonymous memoir. You’re either telling your life story, or you’re writing a novel based on some events that actually took place. I don’t see much gray area between the two. People have lots of good reasons for wanting to publish an autobiography anonymously—usually because others involved in the story will be hurt or feel betrayed to see themselves in print. Sometimes authors even put their safety at risk when they publish. But the whole reason you want to write your memoir is to get your story told. There’s no way to do that honestly without attaching your name to your work.

Lately at Write My Memoirs we’ve had customers wanting to publish their memoir with some level of anonymity. On the surface, this seems like a simple request—just publish under a pen name and, if you really want to hide, choose a pen name of the opposite sex.

As I see it, there’s no such thing as an anonymous memoir. You’re either telling your life story, or you’re writing a novel based on some events that actually took place. I don’t see much gray area between the two. People have lots of good reasons for wanting to publish an autobiography anonymously—usually because others involved in the story will be hurt or feel betrayed to see themselves in print. Sometimes authors even put their safety at risk when they publish. But the whole reason you want to write your memoir is to get your story told. There’s no way to do that honestly without attaching your name to your work.

Children Need the Memoir, Part II

June 24, 2018March 19, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Children Need the Memoir, Part II

It seems Write My Memoirs is not the only one blogging about the link between children’s resilience and knowing their family history (see last week’s blog post). On its “Learning Network” blog, The New York Times cites the same researcher that we did—Bruce Feiler, who has studied the factors that go into making a family effective and the children well-adjusted.

The blog says that after reviewing a study by Dr. Marshall Duke, who developed a “Do You Know” scale asking children questions about their family history, Feiler concluded, “The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative….The more children knew about their family’s history, the stronger their sense of control over their lives, the higher their self-esteem and the more successfully they believed their families functioned.”

The questions the blog lists as examples from the “Do You Know” scale could serve as a guide for content for your memoir: “Do you know where your grandparents grew up? Do you know where your mom and dad went to high school? Do you know where your parents met? Do you know of an illness or something really terrible that happened in your family? Do you know the story of your birth?” In your memoir, make sure you provide the next generation with details about the family that give them a real sense of where they come from.

It seems Write My Memoirs is not the only one blogging about the link between children’s resilience and knowing their family history (see last week’s blog post). On its “Learning Network” blog, The New York Times cites the same researcher that we did—Bruce Feiler, who has studied the factors that go into making a family effective and the children well-adjusted.

The questions the blog lists as examples from the “Do You Know” scale could serve as a guide for content for your memoir: “Do you know where your grandparents grew up? Do you know where your mom and dad went to high school? Do you know where your parents met? Do you know of an illness or something really terrible that happened in your family? Do you know the story of your birth?” In your memoir, make sure you provide the next generation with details about the family that give them a real sense of where they come from.

Children’s Wellbeing Linked to Your Memoir!

June 24, 2018March 12, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

I’m not embarrassed that I read Parade weekly. That skinny little magazine comes with my Sunday newspaper and is hard to ignore, plus it always has some interesting factoids. A few weeks ago, Parade ran a quiz to let readers measure the happiness of their family life. Devised by author Bruce Feiler, the quiz was based on his own research that identified “the ingredients that make families effective, resilient and happy.” The very first question read:

When a team of psychologists measured children’s resilience, they found that the kids who ___ were best able to handle stress.
(a) Ate the same breakfast every day
(b) Knew the most about their family’s history
(c) Played team sports
(d) Attended regular religious services
The answer was (b)! The explanation: “The more children know about their family’s history, the stronger their sense of control over their lives and the higher their self-esteem. The reason: These children have a strong sense of ‘intergenerational self’—they understand that they belong to something bigger than themselves, and that families naturally experience both highs and lows.”

Intuitively, I really relate to that explanation. Don’t you? Doesn’t that knowledge of what came before you provide a necessary identification of who you are? So if you’re not writing a memoir for your own amusement, write one for your children and grandchildren!

Memoir: “Changing the Narrative”

June 24, 2018February 27, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Memoir: “Changing the Narrative”

This morning here in “Chicagoland,” as we call it, we awoke to more snow falling—no surprise there—but also to the news that our city’s own Jesse Jackson Jr. is planning to write a memoir. The announcement comes as Jackson is awaiting sentencing after he and his wife pleaded guilty to a bit of crime—filing false tax returns for Sandi, mail fraud and making false statements for Jesse Jr.—that could land Jesse in prison for up to nearly five years. Jackson also has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

An unnamed source told The Chicago Tribune that Jackson wants to write the memoir in order to “clear up his legacy” and, since “he has nothing else to do right now,” he’s “desperately trying to change the narrative of his life story.”

As I’ve noted before in blog posts, this is a common reason to write an autobiography, even for people who are not facing jail time and are not famous. It’s human nature to want to clear up and clean up your legacy by correcting the perceived “facts” of your life, justifying your behavior, explaining your intentions and, perhaps, expressing contrition for some of what you’ve done. It’s tricky, though. This type of memoir can sound whiny and be seen as making excuses or blaming other people for your bad decisions. But it also can be very satisfying. Even if you don’t change anyone’s mind, you’ve had the gratification of telling your side of your own life story.

This morning here in “Chicagoland,” as we call it, we awoke to more snow falling—no surprise there—but also to the news that our city’s fallen hero, Jesse Jackson Jr., is planning to write a memoir. The announcement comes as Jackson is awaiting sentencing after pleading guilty to a bit of crime—conspiracy to commit wire fraud, mail fraud and making false statements—that could land Jesse in prison for up to nearly five years. Jackson also has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

An unnamed source told The Chicago Tribune that Jackson wants to write the memoir in order to “clear up his legacy” and, since “he has nothing else to do right now,” he’s “desperately trying to change the narrative of his life story.”

As I’ve noted before in blog posts, this is a common reason to write an autobiography, even for people who are not facing jail time and are not famous. It’s human nature to want to clear up and clean up your legacy by correcting the perceived “facts” of your life, justifying your behavior, explaining your intentions and, perhaps, expressing contrition for some of what you’ve done. It’s tricky, though. This type of memoir can sound whiny and be seen as making excuses or blaming other people for your bad decisions. But it also can be very satisfying. Even if you don’t change anyone’s mind as you attempt to “change the narrative,” you have the gratification of telling your side of your own life story. And everyone has the right to do that.

More on Memoirs of War Vets

June 24, 2018February 19, 2013 by Rosanne Ullman

Last week, we told you about the Veterans Writing Project, which offers free workshops and seminars to help veterans and their families write about their military-related experience. But this nationwide program is not the only game in town. Other groups, too, encourage veterans to write out their war experiences. Listed in a recent New York Times article were also Warrior Writers and a local one, the Syracuse Veterans’ Writing Group. If you know of others, leave us a comment below and we’ll post them.

For the article, the reporter asked one of the veterans who had written a memoir why this type of autobiography is so important. He told the reporter, “We write to bear witness.” This seems especially true for vets of recent wars—Iraq and Afghanistan—who experience Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). “The traditional therapies and approaches to PTSD are not getting the job done,” Travis L. Martin, editor of The Journal of Military Experience, told the reporter. “Vets are looking for alternative ways to heal, and they are latching onto writing as a way to do it.”

The article makes the point that writing is therapeutic no matter what type of trauma the writer has experienced. “Expressive writing is used in clinical settings to help patients examine anxieties and abuse that are otherwise unspeakable,” the article goes on to say. “Exposure therapy— retelling a traumatic event over and over until it loses its hold over a patient—often uses writing to extinguish the emotional and physical reaction to trauma.”

If you’re a veteran, we at Write My Memoirs hope you find our site to be a helpful tool that enables you to work through your memories.

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/03/education/edlife/veterans-learn-to-write-and-heal.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

http://www.warriorwriters.org/home.html

http://wrt.syr.edu/syrvetwriters/

Last week, we told you about the Veterans Writing Project, which offers free workshops and seminars to help veterans and their families write about their military-related experiences. But that nationwide program is not the only game in town. Other groups, too, encourage veterans to write out their war experiences. Listed in a recent New York Times article were also Warrior Writers and a local one, the Syracuse Veterans’ Writing Group. If you know of others, leave us a comment below and we’ll post them.

For the article, the reporter asked one of the veterans who had written a memoir why this type of autobiography is so important. He told the reporter, “We write to bear witness.” This seems especially true for vets of recent wars—Iraq and Afghanistan—who experience Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). “The traditional therapies and approaches to PTSD are not getting the job done,” Travis L. Martin, editor of The Journal of Military Experience, told the reporter. “Vets are looking for alternative ways to heal, and they are latching onto writing as a way to do it.”

If you’re a veteran, we at Write My Memoirs hope you find our site to be a helpful tool that enables you to work through your memories.

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Every ordinary life story is extraordinary!

Aiming Your Memoir at a Young Audience?

Boil It Down: The Food Memoir

Try Garner’s as a Reference for Grammar and Usage

Keep a “Quotes Journal” as a Memoir Resource

Check Out Some Memoir Writing Classes

Memoirists: Can You Remain Anonymous?

Children Need the Memoir, Part II

Children’s Wellbeing Linked to Your Memoir!

Memoir: “Changing the Narrative”

More on Memoirs of War Vets

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