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autobiography

Another Key Memoir Writing Principle: Don’t Squander Your Words

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With this next guideline, we’ll be halfway through Kurt Vonnegut’s rules of writing short stories that I’m tweaking to apply to your non-fictional memoir.

Rule 4: Every sentence must do one of two things—reveal character or advance the action.

You might think that because Vonnegut intended these rules specifically for writers of short stories, not even novels, that the word “short??? is key to understanding why a story should embrace Rule 4. But I would argue that even if your memoir is as long as Ulysses at roughly 268,000 words, you should keep this rule at close hand. In fact, I’d swap out “sentence??? for “word???—you should be able to justify the inclusion of every single word you write. If you don’t need a “very,??? a “really??? or an “I think,??? what’s it doing in there?

However, I will permit playing a bit fast and loose with determining what information reveals character or advances the action. In your autobiography, you’ll have to provide explanation and background, which at first glance does not seem to meet either of Rule 4’s requirements but, in my opinion, it certainly can if crafted properly; it’s okay if the payoff does not show up until chapters later. If the sentence truly does not contribute in even a minor way toward revealing someone’s character or advancing the action, though, then I agree with Kurt: your tale is better off without it.

Everyone Wants Something!

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In applying some general writing rules to your memoirs, I’m up to Rule 3 of Kurt Vonnegut’s eight rules for writing a short story.

Rule 3: Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.

This rule makes me laugh. I think Vonnegut is saying that you shouldn’t bring in characters unless you give the reader some understanding of what motivates that character and what that person is seeking. I’m not sure this applies to an autobiography, though. In fiction, you have more of a choice about introducing and developing characters than you do as a narrator of a true life story. For example, you may name a grandparent who died when you were too young to recall a lot about the person, and you can’t just make it up! You may talk about a teacher in terms of how that person impacted your life, but you’re not really concerned with the teacher’s own needs and desires.

What I think you can take from this rule, though, is to be open and analytical about what you want at each stage of your life. Don’t just describe what happens; clarify what you hoped would happen, what you wanted to get from your relationships and why you pursued the goals you did. If you also feel it’s useful to flesh out some of the other people in your life, keep in mind Vonnegut’s third rule of delving into those people’s dreams and expectations.

Vonnegut’s Rule 2: Get Readers on Your Side

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We’re on to Rule 2 of Kurt Vonnegut’s eight rules for writing a short story, which I’m tweaking to apply to your nonfiction memoirs.

Rule 2: Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.

Since you’re the protagonist of your autobiography, I think this is an easy rule to follow! You probably are presenting yourself in a favorable light; I doubt that you’re writing an entire memoire from a self-loathing perspective. You’re a naturally sympathetic character!

But there’s still a writing lesson here. It has more to do with the way you should be building a little suspense. How do you get your readers to “root??? for you? Craft a narrative that maps out how you overcame adversity, reached a tough goal, triumphed over a rival or confronted a demon. Examples include conquering an addiction, repairing an important relationship or working to achieve a rags-to-riches fairytale. Any accomplishment that took a bit of blood, sweat and tears can work. Something as simple as winning a local sports events will be riveting if you write it with that “root for me??? approach in mind. So do not interpret this rule to mean that your autobiography should not reveal your flaws. In fact, the rule indicates quite the opposite: showing your darker side and your struggles, and then examining how you got through them and worked toward light, will have readers rooting for you all the way.

“Dynasty??? Star’s Memoir Proves the Point

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“Dynasty??? Star’s Memoir Proves the Point
In the last blog, I suggested ways to write a memoir that isn’t quite a memoir but, rather, blends autobiographical details with other interests you might have. I included the idea of a cookbook that perhaps would recount experiences you’d had when you served the dishes in the recipes.
In this past Sunday’s Parade Magazine, this cookbook idea came up as part of the celebrity Q&A section, “Personality Parade.??? In response to a reader’s query about whether actress Linda Evans, who appeared on the 1980s TV show “Dynasty,??? might write her memoir. Evans confirmed to Parade that she is, indeed, writing an unconventional memoir: “I’m not doing a tell-all because it’s not my style. It’s a book called Recipes for Life, in which I’ll incorporate two of my favorite things—cooking and eating.???
I had no idea this book was in the works, but I’m glad to see that someone like Linda Evans confirms that this genre blend is a viable concept. So if you’ve ever wanted to write any type of instructional manual but also enjoy talking about yourself, you can accomplish both goals in one book. As Evans says, then you’re not focusing on the tell-all aspect of a memoir but relating information in a natural manner that doesn’t have to dance around topics you’d rather not i

In the last blog, I suggested ways to write a memoir that isn’t quite a memoir but, rather, blends autobiographical details with other interests you might have. I included the idea of a cookbook that perhaps would recount experiences you’d had when you served the dishes in the recipes.

In this past Sunday’s Parade Magazine, this cookbook idea came up as part of the celebrity Q&A section, “Personality Parade,??? in response to a reader’s query about whether actress Linda Evans, who appeared on the 1980s TV show Dynasty, might write her memoir. Evans confirmed to Parade that she is, indeed, writing an unconventional memoir: “I’m not doing a tell-all because it’s not my style. It’s a book called Recipes for Life, in which I’ll incorporate two of my favorite things—cooking and eating.???

I had no idea this book was in the works, but I’m glad to see that someone like Linda Evans confirms that this genre blend is a viable concept. So if you’ve ever wanted to write any type of instructional manual but also enjoy talking about yourself, you can accomplish both goals in one book. As Evans says, then you’re not focusing on the tell-all aspect of a memoir but relating information in a natural manner that doesn’t have to dance around topics you’d rather not include.

Mix Memoir Tidbits With Other Non-Fiction Genres

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Maybe a flat-out memoir is not what you’re intending to write. Perhaps you’re writing a cookbook, travel guide, business manual or history of a city. You could be writing any type of non-fiction and either want to include tidbits of your own life story or find yourself doing that as a natural part of the information you’re providing.

Is that okay? Of course. In the example of the cookbook, you could combine each recipe with a tale about a time that you served that dish—who was at the table and why. A travel guide or municipal history lends itself to recounting your experiences in the locations you describe. A business book could discuss lessons you’ve learned from your own businesses, embellished with more personal details than authors of similar books share.

Personalizing an otherwise informational non-fiction book in this manner can entice the reader to keep reading. It’s a bit of a win/win in that the reader receives the information in an entertaining format, while the author has the opportunity to write a modified autobiography without any pressure or obligation of telling more than is comfortable or going outside the parameters of the topic at hand. So think about it. If you want to write a non-fiction book, your own pertinent experiences may be just the angle you need to set it apart.

Your Autobiography Reflects Your Generation

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I was reading an article about the aging of Generation X, which got me thinking about how our generation shapes our lives. I don’t mean only the time frame into which we were born. Obviously your life will be influenced by a war as you’re coming of age, a recession that costs you a job, a sociological revolution that adjusts your options in society or a technological boom that changes your professional direction. But the people you grow up alongside also have an impact. Your memoirs are bound to reveal that.

If you’re part of what’s referred to as the “greatest generation,??? which lived through both world wars, your contemporaries have a sense of sacrifice and accomplishment. If, like me, you’re a Baby Boomer, you never feel alone. It’s such a huge and self-analyzing generation that everywhere we turn we have someone to whom we can relate, someone who will commiserate or celebrate with us. It provides a collective consciousness that we love to share with each other.

But if you are part of GenX, you might want to check out that article since it makes it sound as if, unlike the Boomers’ case, very little is written about you. You’re alienated and you feel displaced. That’s a great way to frame your memoirs—and motivation for writing them! At least your own life story will be recorded!

What do Teen Autobiographers Write About?

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I’m sure you’re excited to learn that passages are being leaked from First Step 2 Forever: My Story, the autobiography of 16-year-old Justin Bieber. Or maybe you’ve never even heard of Justin Bieber, the latest sensation to top the pop charts. In either case, perhaps you wonder: what’s there to write about when you’ve been on the planet only 16 years?

Apparently, there’s enough to inspire quite a few young people to tell their life story, short though it might be. Of course, there’s childhood. Actress Drew Barrymore’s autobiography, also written at the age of 16, recounted less-than-innocent early years with the introduction of drugs and alcohol, and Kelly Osbourne, who waited until she was a ripe 24 before penning her memoir, told some harrowing tales about growing up under the same roof as dad Ozzy. Gymnast Shawn Johnson, 16 when she wrote her book, and British soccer star Wayne Rooney, who was 22, each focused on a life dedicated to competition and sportsmanship. At just 15, both American pop’s Miley Cyrus and British classical vocalist Charlotte Church revealed details about their somewhat ordinary childhood that proceeded during their very extraordinary rise to fame.

These young authors wrote memoirs more for their fans than for themselves or their families. You may not have legions of fans, but if mere teens can find enough interesting about their lives to craft an autobiography, certainly you can draw on your experiences to knock out a book’s worth of chapters. Keep writing!

Read This Online Autobiography to Study Memoir Style

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Many of you trying to write your memoirs may never have written anything of length before now. While you’ve probably read enough—both fiction and non-fiction—as you try to craft your own autobiography it can be helpful to read passages specifically of others’ life stories. If you can read them online at no charge, that makes it even easier for you.

A classic memoir, The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin, is a good place to start. Click here for the online version, which lets you pull up one chapter at a time. Certainly language has evolved since Ben Franklin’s time, so you won’t want to imitate the wording. But there’s an elegance to the way he writes that you can aspire to assume for your own work. Also, these chapters give you an idea of how to structure your memoir, which topics are important enough to cover, how to introduce dialogue and how candid to be as you describe your friends and relatives.

According to the website, Franklin’s is considered to be the most acclaimed autobiography to come out of colonial America. It covers his early life, travel, professional training, romantic encounters and all sorts of details of his days from his own perspective. Although Franklin lived to be 84 years old, he ends this account at age 51. This illustrates that you can create a compelling memoir by recording what you’ve accomplished so far before without necessarily waiting until you’re in your senior years.

War Memoirs May Skew Details

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A fellow blogger lists nine topics he finds that authors exclude form their war memoirs. I won’t repeat the topics here; click through to his blog On Violence if you’re curious. But I will take issue with his claim that writers who avoid topics they think readers may find unpleasant or boring compromise the integrity of their book.

I distinguish between “the truth??? and “the whole truth.??? I don’t think that you, as the writer of the story that by definition you own, are obligated to mention every last detail of what’s going on in the setting of that story. Number five on the blogger’s list is civilian deaths. “An honest memoir,??? the blogger writes, “will deal with this messy truth about any war.??? I disagree. If you’re writing a non-fiction account of the war, then I believe you should include the facts surrounding civilian deaths. But in your memoir? The war is just one more player in your story. You can write about as much or as little of it as you like, even if it becomes such a main character that you’re really writing a war memoir.

I am all for rich detail in a memoir. But the On Violence blogger calls his nine points a litmus test that must be passed for him to respect a war memoir. While I support writing only the truth in your autobiography, I  disagree that you must include the whole truth for your story to be compelling.

“American Idol??? Connection Reported to be Contemplating Memoirs

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It’s always fun to see which celebrities are planning to write their memoirs. The latest, as reported by digitalspy.com, is Mezhgan Hussainy, whose fiancé is longtime “American Idol??? judge Simon Cowell. Hussainy, 36, was the make-up artist on the set of the show when she started dating the notoriously contrary Cowell.

You might be wondering what a 36-year-old might find so compelling about her life that she already would want to pen an autobiography. Her famous boyfriend, known to closely guard the details of his private life, is not the major focus. Speculation is that Hussainy hopes to share the story of how she and her family fled Afghanistan 20 years ago and immigrated to America.

The digitalspy report quotes a source saying, “Mezhgan really is an amazing woman. She went through so much as a child but she remains full of optimism and positivity. She wants to get her story out in her own words to give hope to others.??? At WriteMyMemoirs, we hear from some of our members who have similar experiences of escaping brutal lives either because of oppressive governments or abusive parents and caretakers. Like Hussainy, they want to get their story out there. Apparently traumatic experiences and wanting to help others are powerful motivators for writing memoirs.

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Then just set up a chapter and start writing your memoir. Don’t worry about rules. There are no rules to writing your memoir; there are only trends. These trends are based on techniques and features identified in current top-selling memoirs. At best, they’re the flavor of the month. If you’re capturing your life in print for your family, for your own gratification or to inspire readers, rather than aiming to set off Hollywood screenplay bidding wars, these trends don’t even apply to you. You’ll write the memoir that suits you best, and it will be timeless, not trend-driven.There are no rules, but there are four steps:

1. Theme/framework
2. Writing
3. Editing/polishing
4. Self-publishing

You’ve researched this, too, and you’ve been shocked at the price for getting help with any one of those steps, much less all four. That’s because most memoir sites promise to commercialize your work. They’ll follow a formula based on current memoir trends, because they want to convince you that they can turn your memoir into a best-seller. These sites overwhelm you with unnecessary information not to help you, the memoir author, but to address Search Engine Optimization (SEO) algorithms so they can sell more.

That’s not what we do at Write My Memoirs. Our small community of coaches, writers and editors are every bit as skilled as any you’ll find, and we charge appropriately for their expertise and the time they’ll spend helping you craft a compelling, enjoyable read. But you won’t pay an upcharge for other websites’ commercialization, the marketing that follows, and the pages of intimidating “advice.” You can sell your book if you like—we have ISBNs available for you—but our organic process of capturing your story takes a noncommercial path.

If you want help with any or all of the four steps above, choose from our services or save money by selecting one of our packages. If you’d like to talk about what’s right for you, schedule a call. One year from now, you can be holding your published memoir in your hand. And at that point, it will be a big deal!

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