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memoir writing

Boxing Day? How about “Memoirs Day”?

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Boxing Day? How about “Memoirs Day”?
If you ask us here at WriteMyMemoirs, we’d say that the day after Christmas is a perfect laid-back day to work on your memoir—or to start one if you haven’t yet. But for many of you in the English-speaking world, December 26 is always Boxing Day, so we thought we’d explain what that is for anyone who may not know.
The origin of Boxing Day is debatable. Some sources claim that food was boxed up to give to the poor, others have it as a day to box up bonuses for the working staff and still others trace it to the retail industry as the day inventory was taken and older items boxed away.
According to eHow.com, today the most common Boxing Day traditions are:
Attend a sporting event. In England, many pro sports matches take place today, and this is probably the most popular choice for a Boxing Day activity.
Tip your service people—the postman, newspaper delivery person, etc.—or bring a gift basket to a clerk in a store you frequent.
Be compassionate: donate canned goods, clothing or your time to organizations that help the needy.
Shop! Take advantage of the after-Christmas sales.
Get together with friends. You all must have leftover food you’d like to get rid of anyway, so share it!
It might not be included on any list of Boxing Day traditions, but writing your memoir is a great way to spend the day, too! Write a chapter on the holidays while they’re fresh in your mind.
http://www.ehow.com/how_11775_celebrate-boxing-day.html

If you ask us here at WriteMyMemoirs, we’d say that the day after Christmas is a perfect laid-back day to work on your memoir—or to start one if you haven’t yet. But for many of you in the English-speaking world, December 26 is always Boxing Day, so we thought we’d explain what that is for anyone who may not know.

The origin of Boxing Day is debatable. Some sources claim that food was boxed up to give to the poor, others have it as a day to box up bonuses for the working staff and still others trace it to the retail industry as the day inventory was taken and older items boxed away.

According to eHow.com, the most common modern Boxing Day traditions are:

  1. Attend a sporting event. In England, many pro sports matches take place today, and this is probably the most popular choice for a Boxing Day activity.
  2. Tip your service people—the postman, newspaper delivery person, etc.—or bring a gift basket to a clerk in a store you frequent.
  3. Be compassionate: donate canned goods, clothing or your time to organizations that help the needy.
  4. Shop! Take advantage of the after-Christmas sales.
  5. Get together with friends. You all must have leftover food you’d like to get rid of anyway, so share it!

It may not be included on any list of Boxing Day traditions, but writing your memoir is a great way to spend the day, too! Write a chapter on the holidays while they’re fresh in your mind.

12/12/12: Mystical Day to Start a Memoir

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While some believe that today’s date signifies the end of the world, many view a repetitive date like December 12, 2012—12/12/12—as good luck. Wednesday is not normally a popular day for weddings, but today you’ll be hearing wedding bells everywhere. As one bride explained, “I figured my husband would never forget our anniversary.”
I’m shamelessly jumping on the bandwagon to propose that 12/12/12 is the perfect day to begin writing a memoir. You’ll easily track how long it’s taking you, and you’ll begin a new year with a long-desired project already underway so there will be no need to put it on your resolutions list for a change. It’s so close to the holidays that—let’s be honest—you’re not getting much work done anyway. You might as well turn your energies toward outlining your memoir chapters or writing up your first anecdote.
One website that addresses this mystical date challenges us to begin something big on this day: “What new seed you plant, and in what soil, is now up to you. What seeds will you plant at the gateway to flourish on your new fertile soil as you walk into the threshold of your new world? Be in a place that you feel is, or will be, a gateway place for you on December 12. The gateway for you may be to face a fear, or it may be a place that encourages you to come into a new power. It may be a place that you feel you can reconcile and bring new truth to the past. Perhaps it is a place that needs transformation and you will go to aid in that for the location, and for your soul.” Sounds like the perfect day to sit down and start your memoir, doesn’t it?

While some believe that today’s date signifies the end of the world, many view a repetitive date like December 12, 2012—12/12/12—as good luck. Wednesday is not normally a popular day for weddings, but today you’ll be hearing wedding bells everywhere. As one bride explained, “I figured my husband would never forget our anniversary.”

I’m shamelessly jumping on the bandwagon to propose that 12/12/12 is the perfect day to begin writing a memoir. You’ll easily track how long it’s taking you, and you’ll begin a new year with a long-desired project already underway so there will be no need to put it on your resolutions list for a change. It’s so close to the holidays that—let’s be honest—you’re not getting much work done anyway. You might as well turn your energies toward outlining your memoir chapters or writing up your first anecdote.

One website that addresses this mystical date challenges us to begin something big on this day: “What new seed you plant, and in what soil, is now up to you. What seeds will you plant at the gateway to flourish on your new fertile soil as you walk into the threshold of your new world? Be in a place that you feel is, or will be, a gateway place for you on December 12. The gateway for you may be to face a fear, or it may be a place that encourages you to come into a new power. It may be a place that you feel you can reconcile and bring new truth to the past. Perhaps it is a place that needs transformation and you will go to aid in that for the location, and for your soul.” Sounds like the perfect day to sit down and start your memoir, doesn’t it?

Some Final Tasks Before You Write Your Memoir

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Some Final Tasks Before You Write Your Memoir
In this last of a series of blog posts suggesting you try some assignments detailed in a syllabus for a university-level memoir writing course, I recommend you follow the syllabus’s direction to read other people’s memoirs along with at least one biography. By reading about people’s lives—accounts both by the people themselves and by their biographers—you can learn a lot about structuring a life story, observe effective ways to write description and dialogue, identify interesting topics to pursue and determine how much detail to include in your own memoir.
After you’ve read other memoirs and you’ve completed the writing assignments outlined here in earlier blog posts, try writing what the syllabus calls “reflection papers.” The idea is to reflect upon one of the memoirs you’ve read or upon your own writing so far in the “class.”
The course’s final assignment is to put together a portfolio of your best writing for the class. This is not necessary, since you’re not actually taking the course. However, the portfolio is to be accompanied by a two- or three-page introduction addressing themes that surfaced in your writing, insights you’ve picked up about yourself, specific ways your writing improved and what you now “believe about a writer’s ability to truthfully convey his or her experiences through words.” I hope you’ve enjoyed taking this virtual college memoir writing course!

In this last of a series of blog posts suggesting you try some assignments detailed in a syllabus for a university-level memoir writing course, I recommend you follow the syllabus’s direction to read other people’s memoirs along with at least one biography. By reading about people’s lives—accounts both by the people themselves and by their biographers—you can learn a lot about structuring a life story, observe effective ways to write description and dialogue, identify interesting topics to pursue and determine how much detail to include in your own memoir.

After you’ve read other memoirs and you’ve completed the writing assignments outlined here in earlier blog posts, try writing what the syllabus calls “reflection papers.” The idea is to reflect upon one of the memoirs you’ve read or upon your own writing so far in the “class.”

The course’s final assignment is to put together a portfolio of your best writing for the class. This is not necessary, since you’re not actually taking the course. However, the portfolio is to be accompanied by a two- or three-page introduction addressing themes that surfaced in your writing, insights you’ve picked up about yourself, specific ways your writing improved and what you now “believe about a writer’s ability to truthfully convey his or her experiences through words.” I hope you’ve enjoyed taking this virtual college memoir writing course!

More Assignments to Prep for Writing Your Memoir

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More Assignments to Prep for Writing Your Memoir
Continuing with the syllabus we introduced in an earlier blog post for a college course in writing memoirs, we come to the next assignment—actually the next two assignments, since they both involve writing a biographical essay. These assignments will accomplish dual goals. First, they will give you practice in writing about someone else’s life before you attempt to write about your own. Second, you could very well end up including parts or all of these essays in your own memoir.
In both essays, you should choose someone you have known personally for a long time. The first essay will zoom in on the relationship you have with that person, who is likely to be a close relative or friend. Explain how your relationship has changed over time. You may find that you’re writing as much about yourself as about the subject of the essay, and that’s okay.
Select a different person for the second essay, which should more directly focus on the subject’s life. A grandparent is a great choice for this essay. Write 5-7 pages about the person as if you’re writing a classic biography. If the person is alive and accessible, you can interview him or her; you also can interview other people who have known the person. Through this exercise, you’ll discover that even a quiet life can make for interesting reading. It will help you to figure out what to write about yourself when you tackle your memoir.

Continuing with the syllabus we introduced in an earlier blog post for a college course in writing memoirs, we come to the next assignment—actually the next two assignments, since they both involve writing a biographical essay. These assignments will accomplish dual goals. First, they will give you practice in writing about someone else’s life before you attempt to write about your own. Second, you could very well end up including parts or all of these essays in your own memoir.

In both essays, you should choose someone you have known personally for a long time. The first essay will zoom in on the relationship you have with that person, who is likely to be a close relative or friend. Explain how your relationship has changed over time. You may find that you’re writing as much about yourself as about the subject of the essay, and that’s okay.

Select a different person for the second essay, which should more directly focus on the subject’s life. A grandparent is a great choice for this essay. Write 5-7 pages about the person as if you’re writing a classic biography. If the person is alive and accessible, you can interview him or her; you also can interview other people who have known the person. Through this exercise, you’ll discover that even a quiet life can make for interesting reading. It will help you to figure out what to write about yourself when you tackle your memoir.

Taking Your Memoir Journal to the Next Step

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Taking Your Memoir Journal to the Next Step
In our last blog post, we introduced an actual syllabus from a university’s memoir-writing course. The first assignment was to write a journal. After you’ve been writing one for a while, you can tackle the course’s next assignment: write three “autobiographical essays” based on memories you’ve documented in your journal.
The syllabus describes these essays as each capturing “a turning point, a memorable event [or] a moment that exemplifies your life in its totality.” The suggested length of each essay is a minimum of four to five pages but no maximum—write as much as you need in order to provide a full description. “Include vivid details that draw the reader into your experience,” the syllabus instructs, adding that you should “provide a sense of what the experience meant to you (although you should not write ‘this is what I learned’ conclusions).”
At Write My Memoirs, we advise doing this very same thing—although instead of limiting yourself to three essays, we recommend writing up as many of your experiences as you need to fill out your life story. You can build an entire memoir upon a series of episodes; in fact, that’s really what a memoir is. It’s an account of moments in your life, how you reacted and what happened as a result. So, instead of considering these as essays, you can regard them each as a chapter of your final memoir. There’s still more to come next time!

In our last Write My Memoirs blog post, we introduced an actual syllabus from a university’s memoir-writing course. The first assignment was to keep a journal. After you’ve been writing one for a while, you can tackle the course’s next assignment: write three “autobiographical essays” based on memories you’ve documented in your journal.

The syllabus describes these essays as each capturing “a turning point, a memorable event [or] a moment that exemplifies your life in its totality.” The suggested length of each essay is a minimum of four to five pages but no maximum—write as much as you need in order to provide a full description. “Include vivid details that draw the reader into your experience,” the syllabus instructs, adding that you should “provide a sense of what the experience meant to you (although you should not write ‘this is what I learned’ conclusions).”

At Write My Memoirs, we advise doing this very same thing—although instead of limiting yourself to three essays, we recommend writing up as many of your experiences as you need to fill out your life story. You can build an entire memoir upon a series of episodes; in fact, that’s really what a memoir is. It’s an account of moments in your life, how you reacted and what happened as a result. So, instead of considering these as essays, you can regard them each as a chapter of your final memoir. There’s still more to come next time!

Before You Write Your Memoir: Exercises to Prepare

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Before You Write Your Memoir: Exercises to Help You
As part of her own memoir writing process, author Shirley Hershey Showalter has been keeping a blog. For one entry, Shirley had received permission from her friend, Professor Melanie Springer Mock, to post the syllabus for a university-level memoir-writing class that Mock was teaching at George Fox University in Oregon. I think you’ll find some of the assignments from this course relevant in helping an amateur writer craft a heartfelt memoir.
The first assignment Mock gives her students is to keep a journal. We’ve talked about that here at Write My Memoirs before. Mock calls journaling “the most democratic literary form,” because everyone has a life story from which to draw, and we all own our stories. Adding that journaling also is “perhaps the most fundamental form of life writing,” Mock expresses the hope that her students will enjoy the journaling process enough to continue with it after the course ends. To guide the students in productive journaling, the syllabus advises:
“A fruitful journal will include more than a summarization of weather and what you had for lunch, although you may write about that as well. Consider using your journal to record daily events, conversations and feelings; to examine your beliefs and thoughts, as well as your reaction to certain daily experiences; to experiment with different writing styles and ideas; and to draft pieces you are working on.” I think those are good suggestions. More assignments next time—check back here next week!

As part of her own memoir writing process, author Shirley Hershey Showalter has been keeping a blog. For one entry, Shirley received permission from her friend, Professor Melanie Springer Mock, to post the syllabus for a university-level memoir-writing class that Mock was teaching at George Fox University in Oregon. I think you’ll find some of the assignments from this course relevant in helping an amateur writer craft a heartfelt memoir.

The first assignment Mock gives her students is to keep a journal. We’ve talked about that here at Write My Memoirs before. Mock calls journaling “the most democratic literary form,” because everyone has a life story from which to draw, and we all own our stories. Adding that journaling also is “perhaps the most fundamental form of life writing,” Mock expresses the hope that her students will enjoy the journaling process enough to continue with it after the course ends. To guide the students in productive journaling, the syllabus advises:

“A fruitful journal will include more than a summarization of weather and what you had for lunch, although you may write about that as well. Consider using your journal to record daily events, conversations and feelings; to examine your beliefs and thoughts, as well as your reaction to certain daily experiences; to experiment with different writing styles and ideas; and to draft pieces you are working on.” I think those are good suggestions. More assignments next time—check back here next week!

All Hail the Presidential Memoir

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Hail to the Presidential Memoir
Since newly reelected Barack Obama already is a best-selling author, we can probably expect him to pen a presidential memoir when he finishes this next term. Most modern presidents do and there’s certainly a market for the first-hand presidential account. Bill Clinton’s memoir, the 900-page, unoriginally titled My Life, has sold in the neighborhood of 2.25 million copies, and sales of George W. Bush’s Decision Points are rivaling that record.
But the champion of presidential memoirs in terms of critical acclaim, you may be surprised to learn, is Ulysses S. Grant. His autobiography focuses more on the war than on his presidential years and had the advantage of Mark Twain as an editor or, some suspect, a ghostwriter. The book stands out for its humility; Grant readily admits to errors and lets hindsight guide him toward an objective evaluation of his actions. Pretty much every other president uses the memoir as a means to justify decisions, self-promote or spin the facts. An apt example is James Buchanan, who was our country’s first president to publish a memoir. And “Silent Cal”? Calvin Coolidge lived up to his nickname, penning the shortest presidential memoir at just under 250 pages. But perhaps the most “silent” was Richard Nixon, who wasn’t one to self-reflect and glossed over the Watergate scandal in his memoir.
Not to be left out, we may see Michelle Obama write her own account of White House life. Both Nancy Reagan and Betty Ford published autobiographies that outsold their husbands’ memoirs, while Hilary Clinton’s Living History has topped $10 million in sales. Time will tell.

Since newly reelected Barack Obama already is a best-selling author, we can probably expect him to pen a presidential memoir when he finishes this next term. Most modern presidents do, and there’s certainly a market for the first-hand presidential account. Bill Clinton’s memoir, the 900-page, less-than-originally titled My Life, has sold in the neighborhood of 2.25 million copies, and sales of George W. Bush’s Decision Points are rivaling that record.

But the champion of presidential memoirs in terms of critical acclaim, you may be surprised to learn, is Ulysses S. Grant. His autobiography focuses more on the war than on his presidential years and had the advantage of Mark Twain as an editor or, some suspect, a ghostwriter. The book stands out for its humility; Grant readily admits to errors and lets hindsight guide him toward an objective evaluation of his actions. Pretty much every other president uses the memoir as a means to justify decisions, self-promote or spin the facts. An apt example is James Buchanan, who was our country’s first president to publish a memoir. And “Silent Cal”? Calvin Coolidge lived up to his nickname, penning the shortest presidential memoir at just under 250 pages. But perhaps the most “silent” was Richard Nixon, who wasn’t one to self-reflect and glossed over the Watergate scandal in his memoir.

Not to be left out, we may see Michelle Obama write her own account of White House life. Both Nancy Reagan and Betty Ford published autobiographies that outsold their husbands’ memoirs, while Hilary Clinton’s Living History has topped $10 million in sales. Time will tell; it always does.

Verb Tenses, Part III

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Verb Tenses, Part III
To finish up this three-part series, we’re going to talk about the “perfect progressive” tenses. Instead of using the past participle as we did for the present perfect, past perfect and future perfect tenses, for the progressive tenses we’ll need the present participle. For example, the past participle for to sing is sung, as in, “She has sung professionally in front of thousands of people”; the present participle is singing, as in, “She has been singing professionally since her teen years.”
Present Perfect Progressive Tense
Conveys current, ongoing action that began in the past, continues in the present and may continue in the future.
Formation: has been or have been + the present participle of the verb
I have been thinking about writing my memoirs.
We have been learning about verb tenses.
Past Perfect Progressive Tense
Conveys past, ongoing action that began in the past before another action.
Formation: had been + the present participle of the verb
I had been thinking about writing a novel before I changed my mind and decided to write a memoir.
She had been reading her book for three hours before she finally broke away to have dinner.
Future Perfect Progressive Tense
Conveys future, ongoing action that will be completed before another future action.
Formation: will have been + the present participle of the verb
As of June, I will have been working on my memoir for a full year.
If he starts his homework now, he will have been studying for three hours when he finally breaks for dinner.
I hope you found these tenses useful! Write if you have questions!

To finish up this Write My Memoirs three-part series, we’re going to talk about the “perfect progressive” tenses. Instead of using the past participle as we did for the present perfect, past perfect and future perfect tenses, for the progressive tenses we’ll need the present participle. For example, the past participle for to sing is sung, as in, “She has sung professionally in front of thousands of people”; the present participle is singing, as in, “She has been singing professionally since her teen years.”

PRESENT PERFECT PROGRESSIVE TENSE
Conveys current, ongoing action that began in the past, continues in the present and may continue in the future.
Formation: has been or have been + the present participle of the verb

I have been thinking about writing my memoirs.

We have been learning about verb tenses.

PAST PERFECT PROGRESSIVE TENSE
Conveys past, ongoing action that began in the past before another action.
Formation: had been + the present participle of the verb

I had been thinking about writing a novel before I changed my mind and decided to write a memoir.

She had been reading her book for three hours before she finally broke away to have dinner.

FUTURE PERFECT PROGRESSIVE TENSE
Conveys future, ongoing action that will be completed before another future action.
Formation: will have been + the present participle of the verb

As of June, I will have been working on my memoir for a full year.

If he starts his homework now, he will have been studying for three hours when he finally breaks for dinner.

I hope you found these tenses useful! Write if you have questions!

Verb Tenses, Part II

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Please read the Write My Memoirs blog post immediately preceding this one. Now that you have a handle on what a past participle is and, I’m going to assume, you pretty much know how to use the present and past tenses, we can move on to the difficult tenses that use past participles. Let’s example three:

PRESENT PERFECT TENSE
Conveys action that either began in the past and continues today or took place at an indefinite time.
Formation: has or have + the past participle of the verb

I have cooked [present perfect tense] dinner but have not served [present perfect] it yet.

You own [present tense] many books and have passed [present perfect] down the joy of reading to your children.

I sent [past tense] an email to my friend, and I hope [present tense] that she has read [present perfect tense] it by now.

PAST PERFECT TENSE
Conveys action that took place before another action in the past.
Formation: had + the past participle of the verb

I had intended [past perfect tense] to eat [infinitive] dinner at home until I decided [past tense] to go [infinitive] out instead.

I suppose [present tense] they had notified [past perfect tense] me earlier, but I neglected [past tense] to mark [infinitive] the date on my calendar.

FUTURE PERFECT TENSE
Conveys future action that will occur before another future action.
Formation: will have + the past participle of the verb

I will have finished [future perfect tense] all of my work when I end [present tense indicating a future event] my day with my favorite TV show.

I assume [present tense] that the teacher will have corrected [future perfect tense] our essays by the time class begins [present tense indicating a future event].

If anything is not clear, contact us or post on our Facebook wall! More tenses next time.

Grammar Lesson: Verb Tenses, Part I

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Grammar Lesson: Verb Tenses, Part I
When our Write My Memoirs members hire us to edit their memoirs, we notice that verb tenses seem to be a tough grammar hurdle that trips up many writers. So let’s tackle these tricky little verbs one tense at a time. I’ll devote as many blog posts as it takes, starting with today.
When we list the forms of a verb, typically we list three tenses: present tense, past tense and past participle. The last one—the past participle—is the most problematic. To illustrate the three tenses of the regular verb to help, you would list: help (present tense); helped (past tense); and helped (past participle). In practice, this goes: today I help the customer; yesterday I helped the customer; over the past week I have helped many customers. You can see that the past participle takes a helping verb like have. For regular verbs, the past participle is the same as the past tense—in this case, both are helped.
However, there are many irregular verbs. Let’s try to take: today I take my temperature; yesterday I took my temperature; I have taken my temperature many times this week. In that irregular example, took is past tense, but taken is the past participle. To run also is irregular: today I run; yesterday I ran; I have run five times this week. That’s an unusual case, because the past participle run is the same as the present tense, first person. Keep in mind, though, that “person” presents another variable that can change the present tense, but the past participle remains the same. With to run, the past participle remains run when we change the example from first person to third person: today he runs; yesterday he ran; he has run five times this week.
Practice on other verbs until we dig into this again next time!

When our Write My Memoirs members hire us to edit their memoirs, we notice that verb tenses seem to be a tough grammar hurdle that trips up many writers. So let’s tackle these tricky little verbs one tense at a time. I’ll devote as many blog posts as it takes, starting with today.

When we list the forms of a verb, typically we list two tenses—present tense and past tense—plus the past participle, which is a component of the remaining tenses and is the most problematic.  The last one—the past participle—is the most problematic. To illustrate the three tenses of the regular verb to help, you would list: help (present tense); helped (past tense); and helped (past participle). In practice, this goes: today I help the customer; yesterday I helped the customer; over the past week I have helped many customers. You can see that the past participle takes a helping verb like have. For regular verbs, the past participle is the same as the past tense—in this case, both are helped.

However, there are many irregular verbs. Let’s try to take: today I take my temperature; yesterday I took my temperature; I have taken my temperature many times this week. In that irregular example, took is past tense, but taken is the past participle. To run also is irregular: today I run; yesterday I ran; I have run five times this week. That’s an unusual case, because the past participle run is the same as the present tense, first person. Keep in mind, though, that “person” presents another variable that can change the present tense, but the past participle remains the same. With to run, the past participle remains run when we change the example from first person (I) to third person (he/she): today he runs; yesterday he ran; he has run five times this week.

Practice on other verbs until we dig into this again next time!

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Then just set up a chapter and start writing your memoir. Don’t worry about rules. There are no rules to writing your memoir; there are only trends. These trends are based on techniques and features identified in current top-selling memoirs. At best, they’re the flavor of the month. If you’re capturing your life in print for your family, for your own gratification or to inspire readers, rather than aiming to set off Hollywood screenplay bidding wars, these trends don’t even apply to you. You’ll write the memoir that suits you best, and it will be timeless, not trend-driven.There are no rules, but there are four steps:

1. Theme/framework
2. Writing
3. Editing/polishing
4. Self-publishing

You’ve researched this, too, and you’ve been shocked at the price for getting help with any one of those steps, much less all four. That’s because most memoir sites promise to commercialize your work. They’ll follow a formula based on current memoir trends, because they want to convince you that they can turn your memoir into a best-seller. These sites overwhelm you with unnecessary information not to help you, the memoir author, but to address Search Engine Optimization (SEO) algorithms so they can sell more.

That’s not what we do at Write My Memoirs. Our small community of coaches, writers and editors are every bit as skilled as any you’ll find, and we charge appropriately for their expertise and the time they’ll spend helping you craft a compelling, enjoyable read. But you won’t pay an upcharge for other websites’ commercialization, the marketing that follows, and the pages of intimidating “advice.” You can sell your book if you like—we have ISBNs available for you—but our organic process of capturing your story takes a noncommercial path.

If you want help with any or all of the four steps above, choose from our services or save money by selecting one of our packages. If you’d like to talk about what’s right for you, schedule a call. One year from now, you can be holding your published memoir in your hand. And at that point, it will be a big deal!

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