memoir writing tips Archives - Write My Memoirs

10 Things Memoir Authors Can Learn from Taylor Swift

October 16, 2025 by Rosanne Ullman

Taylor Swift performing in Tampa during the Eras Tour

She’s a master of writing and marketing.

I’m not the biggest Swiftie out there, but I did take the above jumbotron photo when I saw her in concert during the Eras Tour, and now I’m doing a heavy listen of the new album, “Life of a Showgirl.” Mulling over the lyrics, the storytelling, the marketing and the work ethic, I’ve come up with 10 things memoir authors can learn from Taylor Swift.

Supply details that create a visual. I’m just using other words for “show, don’t tell.” This is probably the biggest takeaway from Taylor’s music. You don’t need the video, because you can picture every moment of the story she’s telling. And the descriptive details she supplies are not cliché or tired, old descriptions you’ve heard a million times, something such as, “Her eyes, the clear blue of a quiet lake, held the promise of a better tomorrow.” No, they’re surprising but precise:
“She wears high heels, I wear sneakers. She’s cheer captain, and I’m on the bleachers.”
“Spinning like a girl in a brand new dress.”
“I can see us twisted in bedsheets.”
“I was walking home on broken cobblestones.”
“The dominoes cascaded in a line.”
“See me nervously pulling at my clothes and trying to look busy.”
“I’m drunk in the back of the car and I cried like a baby coming home from the bar.”
“When we’re on the phone and you talk real slow ’cause it’s late and your mama don’t know.”
Bring readers into your life on an emotional level. And this is the second most important lesson. From listening to her songs, Taylor’s fans feel as if they’re her friends; she shares her thoughts and her experiences with them directly. From reading your book, your readers should feel that they know you well and have an emotional connection with you. These lyrics from Taylor give you an idea of how language facilitates that:
“Well, you stood there with me in the doorway. My hands shake. I’m not usually this way. But you pull me in and I’m a little more brave.”
“In a box beneath my bed is a letter that you never read from three summers back.”
“When my depression works the graveyard shift, all of the people I’ve ghosted stand there in the room.”
Be authentic. I think most memoir authors understand this one. Most likely you’re not writing a memoir to prop yourself up or establish some version of yourself that isn’t true. Just the opposite—most writers I know find that memoir brings them closer to their most authentic self. Through the research and soul-searching that memoir requires, you may feel that you’re in touch with parts of you that either had never before surfaced or had been long forgotten or neglected. Taylor is so overly authentic that conjuring up stories about completely fictional characters in the “Folklore” album introduced a new angle to her music.
Build suspense or anticipation, and later reveal the outcome. One of my favorite Taylor Swift songs, “The Last Great American Dynasty,” tells the story of a quirky woman who, after marrying her way into wealth and real estate, “ruined” the last great American dynasty, according to the townspeople. Her house sat idle for 50 years until, Taylor tells us, “it was bought by me.” And then she had a good time being loud and scandalous and ruining things all over again. So that was a surprise ending. Readers will turn the pages of your memoir to find out what happens. Write your story in a way that makes readers unsure of how precarious situations will turn out.
Drop “Easter eggs” along the way. In building that anticipation, you can mimic Taylor’s habit of hiding clues or what’s come to be called “Easter eggs.” Taylor’s fans are always on the lookout for any hint of what’s next, because she’s become associated with this device. Let’s say in your teens you meet someone who many years later becomes your spouse. You can write something like:
In the group of friends was a guy who caught my eye for just a moment. At the time, we didn’t have a conversation, but somehow I knew I’d run into Paul again someday.
Invent new metaphors and conflate idioms to create a mashup. “I’m a mirrorball,” Taylor sings. “I’ll show you every version of yourself tonight. I’ll get you out on the floor. Shimmering, beautiful. And when I break it’s in a million pieces.” You don’t hear someone comparing herself to what I picture to be a disco ball every day. But I think it works, perhaps not as easily in a memoir as in lyrics, but my point is to take risks with your writing. In Taylor’s song “Cancelled” from the new album, she asks whether you brought a tiny violin to a knife fight. I really like that mashup. In my own writing, I frequently take a common saying and either twist it or mash it up with another one. What I mean is something like:
The prodigal daughter had become a son of a gun. Or:
After a while, I started arriving at work right on time like the rest of the staff, accepting that all being an early bird would ever get me was the promised worm.
Use humor. Many authors write about a dark time in their lives and the redemption that followed. Humor seems out of place in that type of memoir. But if there is a way to inject even a little humor, try doing that. It gives the reader a break from the heavy subject matter. The lyric I’ll cite from Taylor Swift is from the new album’s song “Actually Romantic.” She’s talking about how someone has been throwing shade at her on social media, and it’s sort of cute—“like a toy Chihuahua barking at me from a tiny purse.” Well, it made me laugh, anyway.
Create a brand. Engage with potential readers even before your book comes out. Publishers today are risk-averse and more likely to offer you a contract if you already have a definable following. Taylor understood fan engagement while still a teen, and obviously it’s served her well.
Capture your genius moments. According to numerous reports, Taylor was riding in a car with her then boyfriend, now fiancé, Travis when their conversation about a particular late great actress inspired the song “Elizabeth Taylor,” now track three on the new album. So they parked the car, and she popped out to get some quiet in her head so she could sing a tune into her phone. That’s how she began to write that song. If you’re writing a memoir, it’s always on your mind. Whether you’re daydreaming some lines in the shower or an interesting aspect to your life story wakes you up in the middle of the night, don’t lose the opportunity to grab some paper or your phone and get your thoughts down. They can be fleeting!
Be fearless. Look, you’re writing a memoir. This is not a project born of timidity. You’re already doing something very bold. Don’t be afraid of the writing, don’t be frightened of the ordeal of finding a publisher, and don’t fear the reaction from family or the public. You’ll never finish this project if you glance over at Fear Fiend. So take that lesson. From the name of one of her albums to the way she manages her career, “fearless” is an apt label for Taylor Swift and can be for you, too.

Another 10 Writing Tips from Stephen King

July 10, 2025 by Rosanne Ullman

Someone reading notes while sitting at the computer

What memoir authors can learn from the master of horror narratives.

Following up on the previous post, as promised here are the second 10 of the 20 writing tips from Stephen King.

11. There are two secrets to success. “I stayed physically healthy, and I stayed married.”
Assuming King means success in writing and not in life, I think this boils down to: don’t forget to take breaks. Don’t neglect exercise. Go shoot baskets or walk with your friends. If you eat dinner with your spouse at 6 p.m., continue to eat dinner with your spouse at 6 p.m. Don’t let writing your book serve as an excuse that you’re too busy to pick your socks off the floor or attend your workout classes. I think this is great advice, but it will be hard for you if the way you reach a goal is to become obsessed with the process. Balance is important.

12. Write one word at a time. “Whether it’s a vignette of a single page or an epic trilogy like ‘The Lord of the Rings,’ the work is always accomplished one word at a time.”
This is the kind of thing that makes me wonder whether King had 19 tips and a deadline, and he just threw anything in here to round up to 20. I don’t see the profundity in this tip. And in some ways, it’s not even true. Phrases tend to work because of the whole, not because of each word, one at a time. So you can just skip Tip #12.

13. Eliminate distraction. “There should be no telephone in your writing room, certainly no TV or videogames for you to fool around with.”
Sigh. I’m not sure there’s anyone left who’s old school enough to be in this old of a school. I don’t watch TV when I write, but I pause to do Wordle or check Facebook. I keep my telephone right at my side. I could see turning off the sound even though I don’t do that, but I do not believe it’s necessary to eliminate all distraction. When I get into heavy writing, I’m really in the zone. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to be notified of an emergency. We just don’t live in these little isolated pockets anymore, and it’s ok. You’ll still get your book done. Also, this is another sort of cheat on the number of tips, because #9 was “Turn off the TV.”

14. Stick to your own style.
If you’re like me, you arrive home from a visit to London with a decent British accent. Imitation comes easily in writing, too. You may naturally start writing in a voice sounding a lot like that of your favorite author. Stephen King recommends fighting that temptation and, instead, figuring out your own style. The thing is that no one has your voice except you. It’s as big a draw as your plot, so develop your individual voice and treasure it.

15. Dig. “Stories are relics, part of an undiscovered pre-existing world. The writer’s job is to use the tools in his or her toolbox to get as much of each one out of the ground as intact as possible.”
This is a complex instruction. How do you know when you’ve written enough about that one story? It’s not always obvious or intuitive. Even though he’s talking about fiction, I think keeping this in mind will help you with your memoir. Don’t skimp on the details or get lazy with descriptions.

16. Take a break. “You’ll find reading your book over after a six-week layoff to be a strange, often exhilarating experience.”
I don’t know about this. If you have the time to write, take advantage of that. Life has a way of throwing in those layoffs without our help. But then I agree—after you haven’t read it for a while, if you like the way you write you’ll find it satisfying to go through it.

17. Leave out the boring parts and kill your darlings.
Obviously, don’t write boring content or write in a boring manner. But the second part of this statement is said so often that “kill your darlings” is now a cliché. I’m not a big fan of this advice. It would be hypocritical of me to suggest it, since I rarely kill my own darlings. I don’t understand why the parts I love most should be the first on the chopping block. Makes no sense. But don’t be self-indulgent. If you love a story from your life but it really has no place in this book because it’s out of the time frame or off-theme, then kill it. Otherwise, let friends read your book and ask them specifically about stories that you’re unsure whether to include. Or wait until you have an agent or publisher, who will tell you which darlings to murder.

18. The research shouldn’t overshadow the story.
Typically, memoir authors do not face this problem. If anything, they should do more research, not less. Everyone is eager to tell the story and not always so willing to provide background information. But if you do find that you’re writing more of a term paper than a memoir, you’re emphasizing the research over the story and should correct that.

19. You become a writer simply by reading and writing.
I would change this to say you become a better writer by reading and writing. So yes, read and practice writing as much as you can.

20. Writing is about getting happy.
Oh, I hope so. Once you’ve written your book, you should be pleased with yourself. But that’s not what King means. Especially with memoir, writing your book will lift a burden, work out a lot of psychological issues and let you tell your own story in your own voice. King says this shouldn’t be about the money you hope to earn from the work. I agree with that. You have no guarantee about sales, so write your memoir as a way to get happier with your life.

Tips from A Selection of Memoir-Writing Blogs

May 1, 2025 by Rosanne Ullman

Top Memoir Blog badge for Write My Memoirs

With the Write My Memoirs blog ranked #4 among memoir-writing blogs, let’s look at what the rest are advising memoir authors.

When FeedSpot notified me that it had ranked the Write My Memoirs blog fourth among all online memoir-writing blogs, of course I went to FeedSpot to take a look. And there it was. I didn’t pay these people or do anything out of the ordinary, so fourth sounds pretty nice to me. Then I became curious: what are the other blogs like? If you’re equally curious about the advice other bloggers are giving memoir authors, to save you time I’ve curated tips from a selection of memoir-writing blogs on FeedSpot’s list.

Some of the memoir-writing blogs I went through mostly provide the blogger’s review of books and even movies. I’m not interested—I’ll go to Goodreads if I want reviews. But some do give advice the way I do, anticipating what memoir authors need to help them produce their books. I chose four to share some of their tips with you.

Marion Roach Smith

Seasoned writer and memoir coach Marion Roach Smith has roughly 2,500 social media followers, so I understand why Feedspot awarded her blog the top spot. Her strategy is to interview published writers to get their answers to questions such as how to keep faith in your own ideas. I think these are more or less transcripts from her podcast. But a recent blog post, “In Praise of Humility in Memoir,” departs from that pattern as Smith shares her own views.

From that blog post: “My father, a fine sportswriter, used to say that you should try to write everything like a letter home, a suggestion that’s both graceful and correct. In a letter home you rarely tell those people who raised you how very great you are, or right you are, or unique. You tend to write about the ideas you are trying on, or the things you’ve tried and failed; how scared you are, or how lonely.”

I think that’s pretty good advice, although that last sentence uses the semicolon incorrectly. In a sense, a memoir is a very long letter. Even if you view your book as part memoir and part self-help book, readers don’t want a pompous author crowing about success. As you may remember, I listen to a lot of celebrity memoirs. So the authors are, by definition, famous and usually incredibly talented and good at what they do. But the enjoyable memoirs are the ones that focus more on their insecurities, flaws and failed attempts.

Memoir Writers Network

Occupying the #2 spot is a blog that is updated only every six months or so. I have nothing against book author Jerry Waxler, owner of Memory Writers Network, but I’m not sure why a blog with such infrequent posts qualifies for that rank. Also, I noted some punctuation errors that are probably not simple typos. Still, I found some things of value.

Titled “Siblings Disagree: Family Feuds in Memoirs,” one post focuses on Waxler’s experience reading a particular memoir about a dispute within a family. He explains that as a reader, he doesn’t take sides but instead uses memoirs to inspire a thinking exercise:

“To get the most value from my memoir reading experiences, I ask myself questions. Who are these people? What makes them tick? What would I have done? How deeply did I feel, not just the emotions of the situation, but perhaps even more importantly, how did the author’s presentation lead me through moral, ethical, and emotional dilemmas toward resolution?”

This is valuable for memoir authors to hear. Wouldn’t you be happy to have readers be so affected by your book that they would want to ask themselves these questions?

Louisa Deasey

Down the list a bit is a blog written by Louisa Deasey, an Australian writer who coaches authors and helps them publish—a lot like what I do. She has a big pile of blog posts to choose form, and I looked at one called, “When You’re Feeling ‘Stuck.’” Her answer to breaking that barrier is to come back to your “why” of writing the memoir. I think that’s a great tip.

In the post, Deasey metaphorically compares writing a memoir to growing a plant, writing that “seeds need darkness and quiet time in order to grow. They require faith, vision and trust. We can’t be pulling them up every few days, demanding to see ‘evidence’ of their growth. We can’t be talking to everybody about what it looks like… because we can’t see. The most miraculous creations (in the plant kingdom and in our human lives) don’t look like anything for awhile, until suddenly…They exist!”

I like that comparison.

Write Your Memoir in Six Months

Linda Joy Myers, one of two founders of Write You Memoir in Six Months, wrote a blog post that even I could use to read: “Pushing the Fear of Being Sued to Where It Belongs—on the Backburner.” In Facebook memoir groups, this is a perennially hot topic. A lot of authors fear that the people they write negatively about will sue them, and fighting a lawsuit takes money even if you have confidence that you’ll win in court.

Myers reminds authors that there’s no point in worrying about offending people until you at least have a manuscript. She writes, “The first draft is for you—and it’s for you to sort out your story, what you need to say, and how you’ll say it. The job of the first draft is to give you space to write! You need to claim that space and time and put publication fantasies and worries aside.”

She cautions writers from trying too early in the process to get permission from the people mentioned in the book. As you continue writing, you’ll change and delete a lot of references, so wait. Also, you may not get the answer you’re hoping for, and that could set you back in your motivation.

Myers acknowledges that once your book feels complete, you should consult a lawyer to identify which parts or language will be defamatory enough to possibly generate a lawsuit. You may want to change names and all identifying characteristics of some of the people. But all of that is for later. If you want to write your memoir, just go and write your memoir.

I agree with this advice, too. So I think FeedSpot chose some good memoir-writing blogs for authors to explore. I hope you always come back here to number four as well.

Craft Your Memoir with Four Descriptors in Mind

October 31, 2024 by Rosanne Ullman

Use these cornerstones to shape a compelling narrative.

As an author, you want to write well and craft your memoir in a fashion that keeps people reading. That requires attention to both picky rules and broad conventions. It takes talent and practice, and to some degree one can compensate for the other. But telling a story that people want to read entails more than good writing. I suggest you craft your memoir with four descriptors in mind.

Make it Entertaining

You may think of “entertaining” as amusing, but it’s not quite that. If you’re watching your favorite drama or even horror movie, you’re entertained, right? Shakespeare’s tragedies are as entertaining as his comedies. If you’re a history buff, even his histories will entertain you.

So don’t think of an entertaining memoir as a funny memoir or even a happy memoir, but if you’ve had happy moments, include them. There should be some parts that aren’t dismal. Infuse suspense, because a gripping memoir is an entertaining memoir. Weave in little surprises to entertain the reader with something unexpected. Describe something familiar in a new way—that also will entertain readers.

Make it Relatable

Your readers will not have lived your life, and some of your readers’ lives may not resemble your life at all. But if readers feel empathy for you and can relate to your experiences, they will want to see what happens next. They will want to know whether you make the choices they would have made in your place.

You want your readers to feel the same emotions you felt throughout your experiences. That’s the “show, don’t tell” part. Don’t tell them how you felt in the hope that they can relate to those emotions. Just describe what happened, and if your story is relatable they will feel the same emotions on their own. That’s the magic.

Make it Informative

Books educate us on all sorts of things. Sometimes, books spark interest in a topic we didn’t previously care about. When you’re determining how much text to devote to describing a city you’re visiting or your mother’s medical condition or the professional projects that earned you an award, at least on your first draft write it all out. You can always cut paragraphs during the editing process.

Picture a curious reader, because people who read tend to be curious people. When readers finish your book, they want to have learned something about their world, not just your world. They want to have new knowledge that they can carry with them in general, not only in relation to your story. I’m currently reading Andre Agassi’s Open and learning a lot about tennis competition!

Make it (Mostly) Accurate

Relying on memory is a sure way to include inaccuracies. As a memoir author, you should always do your best to tell the truth. But your truth, as you remember it, is not necessarily how things really went down. This is a challenge for every memoir author.

Lucky are the authors who have spent their lives journaling. In those journals can be fine descriptions and details you wouldn’t even think about twenty years later. You have the feelings you’re feeling in real time.

But if you have no diary to draw from, at least do some fact-checking. Make sure you’re using the correct spelling of the names of streets, people, businesses. Check dates! They’re important to your story but elusive in the memory. Ask people involved in your stories to tell you their recollections of what happened, and compare their accounts with what you’ve written. If you can get your hands on transcripts of proceedings, video footage or any other record of events, take the time and trouble to do that.

You might want to include a disclaimer that you are presenting the events as you remember them. But if your memoir is mostly accurate as well as informative, relatable and entertaining, you will have a book worth reading.

Writing Dialogue in Your Memoir

July 25, 2023 by Rosanne Ullman

Two people sitting on outside steps having dialogue

You don’t have to write very far into your memoir before you realize that dialogue can be a handy tool for you to convey action, emotion, passage of time and more. But even though you’ve read lots of books that have people talking to each other, writing dialogue in your memoir may not come naturally to you.

Sample from F. Scott Fitzgerald

Let’s analyze some dialogue from a classic: The Great Gatsby:

“Why candles?” objected Daisy, frowning. She snapped them out with her fingers. “In two weeks it’ll be the longest day in the year.” She looked at us all radiantly. “Do you always watch for the longest day of the year and then miss it? I always watch for the longest day in the year and then miss it.”

“We ought to plan something,” yawned Miss Baker, sitting down at the table as if she were getting into bed.

“All right,” said Daisy. “What’ll we plan?” She turned to me helplessly. “What do people plan?” Before I could answer her eyes fastened with an awed expression on her little finger.

“Look!” she complained. “I hurt it”

We all looked—the knuckle was black and blue.

“You did it, Tom,” she said accusingly. “I know you didn’t mean to but you did do it. That’s what I get for marrying a brute of a man, a great big hulking physical specimen of a—”

“I hate that word hulking,” objected Tom crossly, “even in kidding.”

“Hulking,” insisted Daisy.

4 Tips in Writing Dialogue

What can we learn from that passage? A lot!

1. When you insert dialogue from a new speaker, start a new paragraph. Sometimes, this applies even when it’s the same speaker. Consider this part:

“All right,” said Daisy. “What’ll we plan?” She turned to me helplessly. “What do people plan?” Before I could answer her eyes fastened with an awed expression on her little finger.

“Look!” she complained. “I hurt it”

Daisy is still the person speaking, but there’s a sentence from the narrator before Daisy’s next line. Also, she changes the subject. Because of those two reasons, Fitzgerald starts a new paragraph for “Look!”

2. Place the attribution either in the middle or at the end of the first sentence. Typically, you mention who’s saying the sentence at the end of it. But you can see in this sentence how you can place the attribution where you might have a comma or force a pause for effect:

“I hate that word hulking,” objected Tom crossly, “even in kidding.”

When you split the sentence like that, keep the second part lower-case. Another way to create the same feeling is to chop off the second part so that it’s just a sentence fragment. In that case, make the first word uppercase:

“I hate that word hulking,” objected Tom crossly. “Even in kidding.”

A common error is to go on for two or three sentences before attribution. For example, this does not work:

“Look! I hurt it,” she complained.

You can do:

“Look, I hurt it!” she complained. But you can’t have two separate sentences before attribution.

3. There are lots of synonyms for “said” as well as words that inherently carry more meaning. Fitzgerald peppers this passage with a “yawned,” a “complained,” an “insisted,” and two uses of “objected,” in addition to going with “said” twice. Here and there he adds a modifier as well—objected Daisy, frowning; she said accusingly; objected Tom crossly. Don’t be afraid to help the reader by describing the way someone says something. Just don’t overdo it. The reader figures it out.

4. You can interrupt the quote with a narrative sentence or two to provide additional facts or description. This passage has three examples—“She snapped them out with her fingers”; “She looked at us all radiantly”; and “She turned to me helplessly.”

Punctuation in Dialogue

In dialogue, all punctuation goes inside the quotation marks. When you attribute after the first sentence, you end that sentence with comma-close-quote and place the period after the attribution. If the person asks a question or says something excitedly, the question mark or exclamation point goes inside the quotes.

This is different from quoting something within a question you’re asking or an exclamatory statement you’re making. Examples:

Can you believe she said, “I don’t remember any of that”?

I can’t believe she said, “I don’t remember any of that”!

Why Include Dialogue in a Memoir

You can avoid all dialogue and convey what people said within an ordinary narrative:

Snapping out the candles, Daisy asked why we needed them when it was so close to the longest day of the year, adding that she always looked forward to the longest day of the year but typically would miss its significance when it arrived. Miss Baker suggested planning something to mark that day this year. Daisy agreed and began a discussion of what to plan when suddenly her attention shifted to her injured finger.

Do you see why that’s not as good as dialogue? It’s more tedious, less lively. You don’t develop the same understanding of the characters as you do when you start hearing their voices in your head. Your memoir isn’t that different from a novel. Use dialogue where appropriate, and know how to use it when you do.

Freeform Writing Can Be the First Step of Your Memoir Journey

October 19, 2022September 28, 2022 by Rosanne Ullman

If you know that you want to write your memoir but can’t seem to get the words on paper or screen, you may think that you need more direction. So you create an outline or a storyboard. You make a list of the stories you’ll tell. You look through old photographs, calendars and diaries to remind you of the important episodes of your life. Then, still, you can’t write it out the way you want. Something is blocking you.

This isn’t writer’s block; it’s an emotional block. You could write it if you could think it, but your memory is hazy. Maybe it feels like a blurry picture you can’t put into focus. Or there’s a high shelf, and you stand on your toes but still can’t see what’s on it. Or you’re trying to get clarity on a fuzzy idea, and you reach out, you grab it, but when you open your fist there’s nothing there. Somehow it eluded you again.

What you need may be less direction, not more. Freeform writing may unlock that memory block and bring you the clarity you’re looking for. But be prepared, because you may discover that you’ve been keeping a big secret from yourself. You’re keeping the secret from your own conscious mind.

If you think you can emotionally handle whatever it is you’re hiding, here are some tips for freeform writing.

You can try to set aside a time for freeform writing, but don’t worry too much about planning. If you find yourself with one or two hours of unexpected open time, take it. Sometimes it’s easier when you don’t have time to anticipate and develop anxiety. Instead, you have the time so you just do it.
Make sure, though, that your time will be uninterrupted. You must be alone.
Most people will probably need quiet. But if you normally write with music in the background, you can try that. There are no rules, only whatever works for you.
Use the instrument you prefer, and if it doesn’t work try another one. If normally you type on your laptop, try that first. If it doesn’t work, try a desktop if you have one or put pen to paper. The opposite is true, too. You may think that you feel more in touch with your writing when it’s handwritten instead of typed, but in this case you may need distance, an emotional barrier, to get out some painful memories. Keyboarding rather than handwriting may provide that for you.
Just write. It’s called freeform writing because you write whatever is in your thoughts without any filter. If you think, “I feel stupid doing this,” write that. Keep writing. “It’s raining. I wish it would stop.” Anything that is inconsequential or may not even make sense will still get your mind thinking. Eventually you’ll write something that will give you a clue.
Read closely what you wrote. If you didn’t have a breakthrough, maybe you can find those clues in there somewhere. Why did you write about the cat you owned as a child? What made you think of that? As you do more freeform writing, you may start to see patterns. Why do you always seem to write about a certain year in your life? Or why does one person in your life always come to mind? Your questions can lead you to answers and prepare your mind for your next writing session.
Monitor your physical reactions. Does your body change as you write certain things? Maybe you’re breathing more heavily, sweating, experiencing nausea, turning red with anger or embarrassment, clenching your teeth or feeling a tight jaw in anger. Awareness of your body during freeform writing can help you pinpoint the thoughts that trigger those reactions.
Be persistent, but don’t push harder than you can handle. You may feel that you’re very close to learning something, and at that point you should try to stick with it. Just don’t put your physical health in danger. You can pick it up next time if you have to.

Freeform writing is not only for memoir authors who want to uncover a traumatic episode. It also can help you just get comfortable writing out your experiences and deepest thoughts.

But if trauma is in your background, freeform writing can be the key that works for you if trying to think through it or talk through it hasn’t helped. Good luck to all of our memoir authors. Each of you has a unique path to follow.

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