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Every ordinary life story is extraordinary!

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Every ordinary life story is extraordinary!

Rosanne Ullman

Rosanne Ullman owns Write My Memoirs (writemymemoirs.com) to help people write and self-publish their life stories and co-owns Home Memoir (homememoir.com) to help people capture, in a coffee-table book, the love they have for their home. For 20 years, Rosanne taught grammar at a local adult education program, New Trier eXtention, and that well-received course is the basis for the Write My Memoirs Grammar and Writing Course. Rosanne has a long freelance career writing for and about various industries, particularly the professional beauty industry. Her observations about life appear frequently on various blog sites and include regular contributions to Sixty and Me (sixtyandme.com) and Boomer Cafe (boomercafe.com). Rosanne also is the author of the children’s picture book The Case of the Disappearing Kisses. She holds a Master’s degree in Journalism (MSJ) from Northwestern University’s famed Medill School of Journalism.

Oates Memoir Examines a Familiar Emotion: Grief

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Oates Memoir Examines a Familiar Emotion: Grief
I’ve enjoyed some fiction by prolific author Joyce Carol Oates, so I was interested to learn that she’s written a memoir that does not follow the traditional mold of telling her life story but, rather, covers primarily the mourning period that somewhat paralyzed her creativity after her husband’s death. The recently published book, A Widow’s Story: A Memoir, was featured this past Sunday in the New York Times Book Review.
As a memoir writer yourself, you may fear that you have nothing new to say about life on earth, that every observation already has found its way into print or onto the Internet. Oates is not the first woman in her late 60s to lose a husband to pneumonia at age 77. This is not a tragic tale; it’s an ordinary one. Yet every story is different. To be sure, Oates brings her considerable gifts as a writer to keep the reader engaged in her narrative, but the real hook is simply the uniqueness of every human experience, every personal relationship, every life.
You don’t have to blaze new ground with your memoir. While many people may share your history in one aspect or another, no one has built the same combination of experiences. You are sole owner of the episodes in your life, and your recollections further reveal your unique reactions. Someone else would have made other choices, acted in different ways. Your memoir will be something that no one else could have authored—only you.

blog81I’ve enjoyed some fiction by prolific author Joyce Carol Oates, so I was interested to learn that she’s written a memoir that does not follow the traditional mold of telling her life story but, rather, covers primarily the mourning period that somewhat paralyzed her creativity after her husband’s death. The recently published book, A Widow’s Story: A Memoir, was featured this past Sunday in the New York Times Book Review.

As a memoir writer yourself, you may fear that you have nothing new to say about life on earth, that every observation already has found its way into print or onto the Internet. Oates is not the first woman in her late 60s to lose a husband to pneumonia at age 77. This is not a tragic tale; it’s an ordinary one. Yet every story is different. To be sure, Oates brings her considerable gifts as a writer to keep the reader engaged in her narrative, but the real hook is simply the uniqueness of every human experience, every personal relationship, every life.

You don’t have to blaze new ground with your memoir. While many people may share your history in one aspect or another, no one has built the same combination of experiences. You are sole owner of the episodes in your life, and your recollections further reveal your unique reactions. Someone else would have made other choices, acted in different ways. Your memoir will be something that no one else could have authored—only you.

Controversial “Tiger Mother??? Demonstrates the Potential Impact of a Memoir

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Controversial “Tiger Mother??? Demonstrates the Potential Impact of a Memoir
By now you would think that every book on parenting has been published and no one could come up with anything new. Then Yale professor Amy Chua pens her memoir, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, and suddenly everyone’s talking about how to raise kids as if it were a brand new topic.
Currently perched at #3 on the New York Times Bestseller List, Tiger Mother examines, but largely champions, the traditional Chinese method of raising children. High expectations, top grades, gold medals in musical competitions—it’s all in there as you would expect. Chua is happy that she was brought up that way and tried to repeat the process with her two second-generation daughters, insisting that it generates self-esteem, independence and success.
This is Chua’s third book, so she already was an accomplished author. She reportedly received a six-figure advance and had a publishing company behind her to promote the book. Still, Chua says she’s surprised her memoir has touched off this firestorm of controversy. In the first week after The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt, more than 5,000 comments followed it. This demonstrates that when you have a compelling story to tell, you never know—it might just become a literary phenomenon.

Blog 80By now you would think that every book on parenting has been published and no one could come up with anything new. Then Yale professor Amy Chua pens her memoir, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, and suddenly everyone’s talking about how to raise kids as if it were a brand new topic.

Currently perched at #3 on the New York Times Bestseller List, Tiger Mother examines, and largely champions, the traditional Chinese method of raising children. High expectations, top grades, gold medals in musical competitions—it’s all in there as you would expect. Chua is grateful that she was brought up that way and tried to repeat the process with her two second-generation daughters, insisting that it generates self-esteem, independence and success.

This is Chua’s third book, so she already was an accomplished author. She reportedly received a six-figure advance and had a publishing company behind her to promote the book. Still, Chua says she’s surprised her memoir has touched off this firestorm of controversy. In the first week after The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt, more than 5,000 comments followed it. This demonstrates that when you have a compelling story to tell, you never know—it might just become a literary phenomenon.

Don’t Listen to Naysayers Who Underestimate You

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Don’t Listen to Naysayers Who Underestimate You
The other day we had a phone call from a new member who has wanted to write her life story for a long time and now is finally pushing herself to do it. I think it’s quite common to keep putting off this longstanding goal until we have time “someday.??? This caller simply dialed up her determination. Everyone has time. It’s all about priorities. Instead of that hour you watch TV, surf the Internet or even read, you could be writing.
Time wasn’t the caller’s major roadblock, though. Whenever she’d mention her intention to write her memoirs, friends and family members would downplay her ability to carry it through. As the first person in her family to graduate from college, and currently pursuing her master’s degree, she knew that she could do whatever she put her mind to doing. She’d had to overcome the same negativity to achieve those previous goals. In fact, she aimed to have her story inspire others to overcome their own obstacles, and she wanted to write it while she was still young and her memories were fresh.
I was very impressed and realized that many of you may be facing the same negativity. Here at Write My Memoirs we support you and believe in you! We know you can do it! And, as we told the caller, if you need writing help please contact us because if getting your story down is important to you, it’s important to us, too.

blog79The other day we had a phone call from a new member who has wanted to write her life story for a long time and now is finally pushing herself to do it. I think it’s quite common to keep putting off this longstanding goal until we have time “someday.??? This caller simply dialed up her determination. Everyone has time. It’s all about priorities. Instead of that hour you watch TV, surf the Internet or even read, you could be writing.

Time wasn’t the caller’s major roadblock, though. Whenever she’d mention her intention to write her memoirs, friends and family members would downplay her ability to carry it through. As the first person in her family to graduate from college, and currently pursuing her master’s degree, she knew that she could do whatever she put her mind to doing. She’d had to overcome the same negativity to achieve those previous goals. In fact, she aimed to have her story inspire others to overcome their own obstacles, and she wanted to write it while she was still young and her memories were fresh.

I was very impressed and realized that many of you may be facing the same negativity. Here at Write My Memoirs we support you and believe in you! We know you can do it! And, as we told the caller, if you need writing help please contact us because if getting your story down is important to you, it’s important to us, too.

Enter Your Memoir or Other Work in a Writing Contest!

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We had an email from a member who wanted to enter a chapter from her memoir in a short story contest and asked us whether we knew of any such contests. A little research turned up quite a few of these competitions, both with entry fees and without, so I thought I’d post them here on the blog in case others of you would like to see whether your work can earn you money and accolades. Check right away, because some of these deadlines are approaching.

  1. This page lists a bunch of contests: http://www.writers-editors.com/Writers/Contests/contests.htm
  2. Here’s another long list, and then you’ll have to google the name of each contest: http://www.suite101.com/content/first-quarter-2011-short-story-contests-and- awards-for-writers-a326426
  3. The Gemini Magazine contest: http://www.gemini-magazine.com/contest.html
  4. The Southeast Review contest:  http://southeastreview.org/contests.html
  5. Some international competitions: http://www.be-a-better-writer.com/creative-writing-contests.html

That should keep everyone busy! You can enter just a chapter from your memoirs or, of course, an entirely separate short story. Please let us know either here or on the WriteMyMemoirs Facebook page if you win something—or even if you enter! We would love to announce your success. And if you would like to publish your story into a small book to hand out, please keep in mind our very affordable publishing services.

WriteMyMemoirs Would Love Your Feedback!

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WriteMyMemoirs Would Love Your Feedback!
As all of you are busy actually writing your memoirs, we want to address any any way that we can help you. Of course, our tech pros are always standing by if you’re having any technical problems, but we also have professional writers who can respond to questions about grammar, structure and research. Even though you can find motivational pieces right on the website, we’ll be happy to “light a fire under you??? if your energy begins to fade. If writing your autobiography is your New Year’s Resolution, for example, the end of January often is about the time that resolutions fall to the wayside. We don’t want that to happen!
You can respond to the blog here, but also please find WriteMyMemoirs on Facebook and Twitter. We would like to start a meaty conversation! While there are lots of grammar sites on Facebook, many of them dissolve into name-calling or pointless discussions about obscure grammar issues that are more a matter of preference. Our language experts will stay on task to provide educated advice about your writing. Further, we monitor our page so that nothing abusive is permitted to remain on it, and remember—there are no stupid questions!
Twitter is even more direct. If you tweet us a question, we can get back to you promptly with a response. It’s like having your English teacher looking over your shoulder!

As all of you are busy actually writing your memoirs, we want to address your questions and any way that we can help you. Of course, our tech pros are always standing by if you’re having any technical problems, but we also have professional writers who can respond to questions about grammar, structure and research. Even though you can find motivational pieces right on the website, we’ll be happy to “light a fire under you??? if your energy begins to fade. If writing your autobiography is your New Year’s Resolution, for example, the end of January often is about the time that resolutions fall to the wayside. We don’t want that to happen!

You can respond to the blog here, but also please find WriteMyMemoirs on Facebook and Twitter. We would like to start a meaty conversation! While there are lots of grammar sites on Facebook, many of them dissolve into name-calling or pointless discussions about obscure grammar issues that are more a matter of preference. Our language experts will stay on task to provide educated advice about your writing. Further, we monitor our page so that nothing abusive is permitted to remain on it, and remember—there are no stupid questions!

Twitter is even more direct. If you tweet us a question, we can get back to you promptly with a response. It’s like having your English teacher looking over your shoulder!

Follow WriteMyMemoirs on Twitter!

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Follow WriteMyMemoirs on Twitter!
Yes, it’s true. A little birdie told us that WriteMyMemoirs has joined the twittersphere and will be tweeting to anyone who’s willing to listen to our 140 characters of wisdom. Like a lot of you, we’re still learning about all of this social media, so please have patience with us!
One goal, of course, is to get our name out there a little more. We’ll be linking to our own website pages and crowing about our services. However, we also will use Twitter to notify our “followers??? about any late-breaking news, contests we may run or observations about pertinent current events. To get into this game, just go to twitter.com, join with your own chosen tweet-worthy name, search for WriteMyMemoirs and press the “follow??? button. We’re also on Facebook, where you can do the same thing—except that you’ll be “friending??? instead of “following.???
For those of you who are internet-conversant enough to be writing your life story online here with us but who prefer not to venture further than that into the technological wilderness, we understand! When we have something significant to tell you, don’t worry—we’ll email our members with the information, blog about it and, if it’s of high importance, add the information to our home page. Please feel free to comment on the blog posts here, but with Facebook and Twitter the conversation can be truly and immediately interactive. You talk to us, and you can be sure that we’ll be tweeting back at

Yes, it’s true. A little birdie told us that WriteMyMemoirs has joined the twittersphere and will be tweeting to anyone who’s willing to listen to our 140 characters of wisdom. Like a lot of you, we’re still learning about all of this social media, so please have patience with us.

One goal, of course, is to get our name out there a little more. We’ll be linking to our own website pages and crowing about our services. However, we also will use Twitter to notify our “followers??? about any late-breaking news, contests we may run or observations about pertinent current events. To get into this game, just go to twitter.com, join with your own chosen tweet-worthy name, search for WriteMyMemoirs and press the “follow??? button. We’re also on Facebook, where you can do the same thing—except that you’ll be “friending??? instead of “following.???

For those of you who are internet-conversant enough to be writing your life story online here with us but who prefer not to venture farther than that into the technological wilderness, we understand! When we have something significant to tell you, don’t worry—we’ll email our members with the information, blog about it and, if it’s of high importance, add the information to our home page. Please feel free to comment on the blog posts here, but with Facebook and Twitter the conversation can be truly and immediately interactive. You talk to us, and you can be sure that we’ll be tweeting back at ya!

Cautionary Tale Reminds Everyone to “Sign Up Today!??? for WriteMyMemoirs

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Here at WriteMyMemoirs (WMM), we received a frustrating email recently from someone who could not find any record of memoirs that she had written. Two weeks earlier she had replaced her computer with a newer model. Her work had been saved to that computer’s hard drive, and now she had no access to it. She believed that she also had kept her story on some website or other. Her hope was that the website she’d joined was WMM, although trying to sign in was proving futile.

Our internal investigation showed that she never did sign up with us or write her story here. Perhaps her memoirs are floating out in cyberspace somewhere; who knows? We named our site Write My Memoirs for a reason: it’s easy to remember. Put even just “write memoirs??? into the Google search engine, and our site comes up on the first page. Clearly, the way this emailer found us now to write to us was that the site is so readily traceable and available.

Membership on WMM is free, writing your life story here is free and saving it to your account to keep it safe is also free. We know how much time, energy and commitment it takes to write every page of a memoir, and sometimes you cannot recreate what you have researched and written. We feel so bad for our emailer and urge you to please sign up today so that you do not repeat her mistake and lose your memoirs!

Your Name as a Pun in the Title of Your Memoir

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Your Name as a Pun in the Title of Your Memoir
To pick up from the post two weeks ago, as promised I will share with you some autobiography titles that are puns. The idea is to think of your first or last name as if it’s just a word. Does it sound like any other word? If that doesn’t work, maybe your story focuses heavily on your profession and you can use that instead. An example is the memoir of singer Davy Jones, They Made a Monkee Out of Me.
Some names are easier than others. When Chris Lemmon wrote a biography of his father, actor Jack Lemmon, their shared last name served up all sorts of ideas. He could have selected “Lemmon Aid??? or “Lemmon Juice??? or something, but he chose A Twist of Lemmon. The 2009 autobiography of “Full House??? actress Jody Sweetin is titled Unsweetined: A Memoir, while actor David Hasselhoff drew from both his name and his nickname to publish Don’t Hassel the Hoff.
“M.A.S.H.??? actor Jamie Farr could have gone with the obvious and called his memoir something like “Going Too Farr,??? but instead he chose to make the pun on the word “for??? and titled it Just Farr Fun. Go figure. Probably my favorite pun title belongs to Hank Ketchum, the creator of Dennis the Menace, who named his autobiography Merchant of Dennis. Give it some thought. Maybe hidden in your name lies the potential to devise a catchy title for your life story

To pick up from the post two weeks ago, as promised I will share with you some autobiography titles that are puns. The idea is to think of your first or last name as if it’s just a word. Does it sound like any other word? If that doesn’t work, maybe your story focuses heavily on your profession and you can use that instead. An example is the memoir of singer Davy Jones, They Made a Monkee Out of Me.

Some names are easier than others. When Chris Lemmon wrote a biography of his father, actor Jack Lemmon, their shared last name served up all sorts of ideas. He could have selected “Lemmon Aid??? or “Lemmon Juice??? or something, but he chose A Twist of Lemmon. The 2009 autobiography of “Full House??? actress Jody Sweetin is titled Unsweetined: A Memoir, while actor David Hasselhoff drew from both his name and his nickname to publish Don’t Hassel the Hoff.

“M.A.S.H.??? actor Jamie Farr could have gone with the obvious and called his memoir something like “Going Too Farr,??? but instead he chose to make the pun on the word “for??? and titled it Just Farr Fun. Go figure. Probably my favorite pun title belongs to Hank Ketchum, the creator of Dennis the Menace, who named his autobiography Merchant of Dennis. Give it some thought. Maybe hidden in your name lies the potential to devise a catchy title for your life story that no one else is likely to have.

A Posthumous Memoir Can Honor a Loved One

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Before I supply those puns I promised last time, I want to take this last blog post of the year to discuss a more serious matter. Last week one of my relatives lost his dad. His grandchildren are grown and got to know him, but his little great-grandchildren never will. That got us thinking here at WriteMyMemoirs about how to honor a loved one who has passed away.

When someone dies, the family typically hears all sorts of nice comments about the person. Friends and relatives tell stories you may not have heard before. You already have your account on WriteMyMemoirs, so it’s easy to write these down so that you never forget them. Just go to the table of contents and set up a new chapter with the name of the person whose memory you want to honor. It doesn’t have to be a family member; it can be a friend. Start with your own testimonial, and invite others to email you their comments that you can then copy into the chapter. With photos of the person at different ages, your tribute will be complete.

After you have recorded as many comments as you feel necessary, you can have a small memorial book published right here on WriteMyMemoirs by going to our Publishing Page. Distribute one copy to every person who contributed thoughts, and save a few for future generations to come along. This could be an amazing tribute to someone you miss.

Choose the Right Title for Your Memoir

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Is there any such thing really as a “right title??? for your memoir? Maybe not, but before you go calling it My Life—or just Life, which is what Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards called his—at least give some thought to what differentiates your life story from every other one out there.

Maybe it’s your career. Let’s say you’re an accountant or bookkeeper. You could title your book It All Adds Up. Or, instead, you could refer to a cherished hobby. If you love working with your hands, for example, you could name your book Crafting a Life. Perhaps you identify most with being a parent. Then you might choose a title like A Dad’s Tale. If you prefer to focus on how your upbringing shaped your life, you could try something specific like Shy Daughter in a Show Biz Family.

Many of us have a favorite saying that we repeat often and can be reworked to serve as a handy title for an autobiography. For example, if you mention in your book that you’re constantly saying, “If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen,??? you could call your book Still in the Kitchen as a way to show that you’re always willing to stand up for your beliefs. And then there are puns. Oh, the puns! Let’s save those for next time.

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Then just set up a chapter and start writing your memoir. Don’t worry about rules. There are no rules to writing your memoir; there are only trends. These trends are based on techniques and features identified in current top-selling memoirs. At best, they’re the flavor of the month. If you’re capturing your life in print for your family, for your own gratification or to inspire readers, rather than aiming to set off Hollywood screenplay bidding wars, these trends don’t even apply to you. You’ll write the memoir that suits you best, and it will be timeless, not trend-driven.There are no rules, but there are four steps:

1. Theme/framework
2. Writing
3. Editing/polishing
4. Self-publishing

You’ve researched this, too, and you’ve been shocked at the price for getting help with any one of those steps, much less all four. That’s because most memoir sites promise to commercialize your work. They’ll follow a formula based on current memoir trends, because they want to convince you that they can turn your memoir into a best-seller. These sites overwhelm you with unnecessary information not to help you, the memoir author, but to address Search Engine Optimization (SEO) algorithms so they can sell more.

That’s not what we do at Write My Memoirs. Our small community of coaches, writers and editors are every bit as skilled as any you’ll find, and we charge appropriately for their expertise and the time they’ll spend helping you craft a compelling, enjoyable read. But you won’t pay an upcharge for other websites’ commercialization, the marketing that follows, and the pages of intimidating “advice.” You can sell your book if you like—we have ISBNs available for you—but our organic process of capturing your story takes a noncommercial path.

If you want help with any or all of the four steps above, choose from our services or save money by selecting one of our packages. If you’d like to talk about what’s right for you, schedule a call. One year from now, you can be holding your published memoir in your hand. And at that point, it will be a big deal!

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