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Every ordinary life story is extraordinary!

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Every ordinary life story is extraordinary!

Rosanne Ullman

Rosanne Ullman owns Write My Memoirs (writemymemoirs.com) to help people write and self-publish their life stories and co-owns Home Memoir (homememoir.com) to help people capture, in a coffee-table book, the love they have for their home. For 20 years, Rosanne taught grammar at a local adult education program, New Trier eXtention, and that well-received course is the basis for the Write My Memoirs Grammar and Writing Course. Rosanne has a long freelance career writing for and about various industries, particularly the professional beauty industry. Her observations about life appear frequently on various blog sites and include regular contributions to Sixty and Me (sixtyandme.com) and Boomer Cafe (boomercafe.com). Rosanne also is the author of the children’s picture book The Case of the Disappearing Kisses. She holds a Master’s degree in Journalism (MSJ) from Northwestern University’s famed Medill School of Journalism.

Hey, Charlie Sheen, Write a Memoir!

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To Charlie Sheen: Write a Memoir!
Say what you want about him, but clearly Mr. Charlie Sheen has an audience. I was shocked when his upcoming one-man show, “My Violent Torpedo of Truth,??? sold out here in Chicago within 15 minutes. Like many of us, Charlie wants to tell his own story from his point of view—and make a little money from it. What Charlie should do is write a memoir.
You own your story in the same way. Perhaps one day your children will write their memoirs and feature you fairly prominently. Maybe your former spouse, business associate, employee or friend will pen an autobiography with a chapter devoted to his or her relationship with you. Then suddenly you become Martin Sheen (Charlie’s dad) or Chuck Lorre (Charlie’s boss)—your reputation is in the hands of someone seeking to expose a “torpedo of truth??? about you. When you have your own memoir out there, that’s all the ammunition you need to have your side of the story heard as well.
I certainly hope you do not have the level of conflict and drama in your life that Charlie Sheen has in his. But if you ask five people to describe any situation, you’re likely to get five different perspectives and, often, a pile of contradictory “facts.??? So while many people look at this Sheen Show as a train wreck or a circus, I consider it a lesson: make sure that your voice is heard. Put your life story in writing.

Say what you want about him, but clearly Mr. Charlie Sheen has an audience. I was shocked when his upcoming one-man show, “My Violent Torpedo of Truth,??? sold out here in Chicago within 15 minutes. Like many of us, Charlie wants to tell his own story from his point of view—and make a little money from it. What Charlie should do is write a memoir.

You own your story in the same way. Perhaps one day your children will write their memoirs and feature you fairly prominently. Maybe your former spouse, business associate, employee or friend will pen an autobiography with a chapter devoted to his or her relationship with you. Then suddenly you become Martin Sheen (Charlie’s dad) or Chuck Lorre (Charlie’s boss)—your reputation is in the hands of someone seeking to expose a “torpedo of truth??? about you. When you have your own memoir out there, that’s all the ammunition you need to make sure that your side of the story receives equal play.

I certainly hope you do not have the level of conflict and drama in your life that Charlie Sheen has in his. But if you ask five people to describe any situation, you’re likely to get five different perspectives and, often, a pile of contradictory “facts.??? So while many people look at this Sheen Show as a train wreck or a circus, I consider it a lesson: make sure that your voice is heard. Put your life story in writing.

Oprah Says: Your Memoirs May Help Others

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Oprah Says: Your Memoirs May Help Others
Did you see Oprah’s recent interview of Meredith Baxter? Meredith has been making the talk show circuit to publicize her new memoir, Untied, and Oprah devoted a full hour to the book. Like many memoirs, Baxter’s story revealed a life filled with personal challenges. She grew up with neglectful parents, faced spousal abuse, took up alcohol for a time, battled cancer and came out as a lesbian. It’s not your typical life.
But unusual circumstances are exactly what prompt many people to write their memoirs. Part of the motivation is that catharsis of getting it all out there and off your chest. But Oprah hit it when she mentioned the other part: hoping to save others from the same fate. We all can feel so alone when dealing with hardship. Reading other people’s accounts of how they handled that same difficulty can make us feel less alone as well as, perhaps, showing us ways to solve our problems. Although I don’t remember her exact words, I recall hearing Oprah making a very pointed statement, something like: you hope when you write these things that you’ll help other people who find themselves in a similar situation.
Now and then one of our members confirms that, telling us, “I had a terrible childhood and want my story out there to help others.??? The memoir can serve as a cautionary tale or an uplifting assurance of redemption. If Oprah says so, it must be true!

Blog 82Did you see Oprah’s recent interview of Meredith Baxter? Meredith has been making the talk show circuit to publicize her new memoir, Untied, and Oprah devoted a full hour to the book. Like many memoirs, Baxter’s autobiography revealed a life filled with personal challenges. She grew up with neglectful parents, faced spousal abuse, took up alcohol for a time, battled cancer and came out as a lesbian. It’s not your typical life.

But unusual circumstances are exactly what prompt many people to write their memoirs. Part of the motivation is that catharsis of getting it all out there and off your chest, and Oprah really nailed it when she mentioned the other part: hoping to save others from the same fate. We all can feel so alone when dealing with hardship. Reading other people’s accounts of how they handled that same difficulty can make us feel less alone as well as, perhaps, showing us ways to solve our problems. Although I don’t remember her exact words, I recall hearing Oprah making a very pointed statement, something like: you hope when you write these things that you’ll help other people who find themselves in a similar situation.

Now and then one of our members confirms that, telling us, “I had a terrible childhood and want my story out there to help others.??? The memoir can serve as a cautionary tale or an uplifting assurance of redemption. If Oprah says so, it must be true!

A Common Question at Write My Memoirs

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A Common Question at Write My Memoirs
All Write My Memoirs members should have received an email recently that lists some of the newer services we’ve added. If you need help writing your memoirs or if you’ve finished writing and you would like to publish your book, we now have both writing and publishing services available.
Our email prompted some members to write back to us, with one question consistently dominating our mailbox: “Why is this site free???? Perhaps people feel that there must be some catch. Why would we permit everyone and anyone to write a memoir on our site and use our own resources to keep it safe here, online, so that the writer can return to it day or night, month after month, no matter how long it takes to complete?
We answer every legitimate email we receive. In response to those who ask that question, we explain that the founder of Write My Memoirs was looking for a website to help him write his own life story. Not satisfied with the meager efforts available at the time, he launched writemymemoirs.com to help others who had the same goal in mind. So there’s no catch! Our new writing help and publishing services, which are fee-based, help us to maintain the rest of the site so that there’s never a charge to join, write a memoir and keep it online at Write My Memoirs.

All Write My Memoirs members should have received an email recently that lists some of the newer services we’ve added. If you need help writing your memoirs or if you’ve finished writing and you would like to publish your book, we now have both writing and publishing services available.

Our email prompted some members to write back to us, with one question consistently dominating our mailbox: “Why is this site free???? Perhaps people feel that there must be some catch. Why would we permit everyone and anyone to write a memoir on our site and use our resources to keep it safe here, online, so that the writer can return to it day or night, month after month, no matter how long it takes to complete?

We answer every legitimate email we receive. In response to those who ask that question, we explain that the founder of Write My Memoirs was looking for a website to help him write his own life story. Not satisfied with the meager efforts available at the time, he launched writemymemoirs.com to help others who had the same goal in mind. So there’s no catch! Our new writing help and publishing services, which are fee-based, help us to maintain the rest of the site so that there’s never a charge to join, write a memoir and keep it online at Write My Memoirs.

Oates Memoir Examines a Familiar Emotion: Grief

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Oates Memoir Examines a Familiar Emotion: Grief
I’ve enjoyed some fiction by prolific author Joyce Carol Oates, so I was interested to learn that she’s written a memoir that does not follow the traditional mold of telling her life story but, rather, covers primarily the mourning period that somewhat paralyzed her creativity after her husband’s death. The recently published book, A Widow’s Story: A Memoir, was featured this past Sunday in the New York Times Book Review.
As a memoir writer yourself, you may fear that you have nothing new to say about life on earth, that every observation already has found its way into print or onto the Internet. Oates is not the first woman in her late 60s to lose a husband to pneumonia at age 77. This is not a tragic tale; it’s an ordinary one. Yet every story is different. To be sure, Oates brings her considerable gifts as a writer to keep the reader engaged in her narrative, but the real hook is simply the uniqueness of every human experience, every personal relationship, every life.
You don’t have to blaze new ground with your memoir. While many people may share your history in one aspect or another, no one has built the same combination of experiences. You are sole owner of the episodes in your life, and your recollections further reveal your unique reactions. Someone else would have made other choices, acted in different ways. Your memoir will be something that no one else could have authored—only you.

blog81I’ve enjoyed some fiction by prolific author Joyce Carol Oates, so I was interested to learn that she’s written a memoir that does not follow the traditional mold of telling her life story but, rather, covers primarily the mourning period that somewhat paralyzed her creativity after her husband’s death. The recently published book, A Widow’s Story: A Memoir, was featured this past Sunday in the New York Times Book Review.

As a memoir writer yourself, you may fear that you have nothing new to say about life on earth, that every observation already has found its way into print or onto the Internet. Oates is not the first woman in her late 60s to lose a husband to pneumonia at age 77. This is not a tragic tale; it’s an ordinary one. Yet every story is different. To be sure, Oates brings her considerable gifts as a writer to keep the reader engaged in her narrative, but the real hook is simply the uniqueness of every human experience, every personal relationship, every life.

You don’t have to blaze new ground with your memoir. While many people may share your history in one aspect or another, no one has built the same combination of experiences. You are sole owner of the episodes in your life, and your recollections further reveal your unique reactions. Someone else would have made other choices, acted in different ways. Your memoir will be something that no one else could have authored—only you.

Controversial “Tiger Mother??? Demonstrates the Potential Impact of a Memoir

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Controversial “Tiger Mother??? Demonstrates the Potential Impact of a Memoir
By now you would think that every book on parenting has been published and no one could come up with anything new. Then Yale professor Amy Chua pens her memoir, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, and suddenly everyone’s talking about how to raise kids as if it were a brand new topic.
Currently perched at #3 on the New York Times Bestseller List, Tiger Mother examines, but largely champions, the traditional Chinese method of raising children. High expectations, top grades, gold medals in musical competitions—it’s all in there as you would expect. Chua is happy that she was brought up that way and tried to repeat the process with her two second-generation daughters, insisting that it generates self-esteem, independence and success.
This is Chua’s third book, so she already was an accomplished author. She reportedly received a six-figure advance and had a publishing company behind her to promote the book. Still, Chua says she’s surprised her memoir has touched off this firestorm of controversy. In the first week after The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt, more than 5,000 comments followed it. This demonstrates that when you have a compelling story to tell, you never know—it might just become a literary phenomenon.

Blog 80By now you would think that every book on parenting has been published and no one could come up with anything new. Then Yale professor Amy Chua pens her memoir, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, and suddenly everyone’s talking about how to raise kids as if it were a brand new topic.

Currently perched at #3 on the New York Times Bestseller List, Tiger Mother examines, and largely champions, the traditional Chinese method of raising children. High expectations, top grades, gold medals in musical competitions—it’s all in there as you would expect. Chua is grateful that she was brought up that way and tried to repeat the process with her two second-generation daughters, insisting that it generates self-esteem, independence and success.

This is Chua’s third book, so she already was an accomplished author. She reportedly received a six-figure advance and had a publishing company behind her to promote the book. Still, Chua says she’s surprised her memoir has touched off this firestorm of controversy. In the first week after The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt, more than 5,000 comments followed it. This demonstrates that when you have a compelling story to tell, you never know—it might just become a literary phenomenon.

Don’t Listen to Naysayers Who Underestimate You

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Don’t Listen to Naysayers Who Underestimate You
The other day we had a phone call from a new member who has wanted to write her life story for a long time and now is finally pushing herself to do it. I think it’s quite common to keep putting off this longstanding goal until we have time “someday.??? This caller simply dialed up her determination. Everyone has time. It’s all about priorities. Instead of that hour you watch TV, surf the Internet or even read, you could be writing.
Time wasn’t the caller’s major roadblock, though. Whenever she’d mention her intention to write her memoirs, friends and family members would downplay her ability to carry it through. As the first person in her family to graduate from college, and currently pursuing her master’s degree, she knew that she could do whatever she put her mind to doing. She’d had to overcome the same negativity to achieve those previous goals. In fact, she aimed to have her story inspire others to overcome their own obstacles, and she wanted to write it while she was still young and her memories were fresh.
I was very impressed and realized that many of you may be facing the same negativity. Here at Write My Memoirs we support you and believe in you! We know you can do it! And, as we told the caller, if you need writing help please contact us because if getting your story down is important to you, it’s important to us, too.

blog79The other day we had a phone call from a new member who has wanted to write her life story for a long time and now is finally pushing herself to do it. I think it’s quite common to keep putting off this longstanding goal until we have time “someday.??? This caller simply dialed up her determination. Everyone has time. It’s all about priorities. Instead of that hour you watch TV, surf the Internet or even read, you could be writing.

Time wasn’t the caller’s major roadblock, though. Whenever she’d mention her intention to write her memoirs, friends and family members would downplay her ability to carry it through. As the first person in her family to graduate from college, and currently pursuing her master’s degree, she knew that she could do whatever she put her mind to doing. She’d had to overcome the same negativity to achieve those previous goals. In fact, she aimed to have her story inspire others to overcome their own obstacles, and she wanted to write it while she was still young and her memories were fresh.

I was very impressed and realized that many of you may be facing the same negativity. Here at Write My Memoirs we support you and believe in you! We know you can do it! And, as we told the caller, if you need writing help please contact us because if getting your story down is important to you, it’s important to us, too.

Enter Your Memoir or Other Work in a Writing Contest!

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We had an email from a member who wanted to enter a chapter from her memoir in a short story contest and asked us whether we knew of any such contests. A little research turned up quite a few of these competitions, both with entry fees and without, so I thought I’d post them here on the blog in case others of you would like to see whether your work can earn you money and accolades. Check right away, because some of these deadlines are approaching.

  1. This page lists a bunch of contests: http://www.writers-editors.com/Writers/Contests/contests.htm
  2. Here’s another long list, and then you’ll have to google the name of each contest: http://www.suite101.com/content/first-quarter-2011-short-story-contests-and- awards-for-writers-a326426
  3. The Gemini Magazine contest: http://www.gemini-magazine.com/contest.html
  4. The Southeast Review contest:  http://southeastreview.org/contests.html
  5. Some international competitions: http://www.be-a-better-writer.com/creative-writing-contests.html

That should keep everyone busy! You can enter just a chapter from your memoirs or, of course, an entirely separate short story. Please let us know either here or on the WriteMyMemoirs Facebook page if you win something—or even if you enter! We would love to announce your success. And if you would like to publish your story into a small book to hand out, please keep in mind our very affordable publishing services.

WriteMyMemoirs Would Love Your Feedback!

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WriteMyMemoirs Would Love Your Feedback!
As all of you are busy actually writing your memoirs, we want to address any any way that we can help you. Of course, our tech pros are always standing by if you’re having any technical problems, but we also have professional writers who can respond to questions about grammar, structure and research. Even though you can find motivational pieces right on the website, we’ll be happy to “light a fire under you??? if your energy begins to fade. If writing your autobiography is your New Year’s Resolution, for example, the end of January often is about the time that resolutions fall to the wayside. We don’t want that to happen!
You can respond to the blog here, but also please find WriteMyMemoirs on Facebook and Twitter. We would like to start a meaty conversation! While there are lots of grammar sites on Facebook, many of them dissolve into name-calling or pointless discussions about obscure grammar issues that are more a matter of preference. Our language experts will stay on task to provide educated advice about your writing. Further, we monitor our page so that nothing abusive is permitted to remain on it, and remember—there are no stupid questions!
Twitter is even more direct. If you tweet us a question, we can get back to you promptly with a response. It’s like having your English teacher looking over your shoulder!

As all of you are busy actually writing your memoirs, we want to address your questions and any way that we can help you. Of course, our tech pros are always standing by if you’re having any technical problems, but we also have professional writers who can respond to questions about grammar, structure and research. Even though you can find motivational pieces right on the website, we’ll be happy to “light a fire under you??? if your energy begins to fade. If writing your autobiography is your New Year’s Resolution, for example, the end of January often is about the time that resolutions fall to the wayside. We don’t want that to happen!

You can respond to the blog here, but also please find WriteMyMemoirs on Facebook and Twitter. We would like to start a meaty conversation! While there are lots of grammar sites on Facebook, many of them dissolve into name-calling or pointless discussions about obscure grammar issues that are more a matter of preference. Our language experts will stay on task to provide educated advice about your writing. Further, we monitor our page so that nothing abusive is permitted to remain on it, and remember—there are no stupid questions!

Twitter is even more direct. If you tweet us a question, we can get back to you promptly with a response. It’s like having your English teacher looking over your shoulder!

Follow WriteMyMemoirs on Twitter!

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Follow WriteMyMemoirs on Twitter!
Yes, it’s true. A little birdie told us that WriteMyMemoirs has joined the twittersphere and will be tweeting to anyone who’s willing to listen to our 140 characters of wisdom. Like a lot of you, we’re still learning about all of this social media, so please have patience with us!
One goal, of course, is to get our name out there a little more. We’ll be linking to our own website pages and crowing about our services. However, we also will use Twitter to notify our “followers??? about any late-breaking news, contests we may run or observations about pertinent current events. To get into this game, just go to twitter.com, join with your own chosen tweet-worthy name, search for WriteMyMemoirs and press the “follow??? button. We’re also on Facebook, where you can do the same thing—except that you’ll be “friending??? instead of “following.???
For those of you who are internet-conversant enough to be writing your life story online here with us but who prefer not to venture further than that into the technological wilderness, we understand! When we have something significant to tell you, don’t worry—we’ll email our members with the information, blog about it and, if it’s of high importance, add the information to our home page. Please feel free to comment on the blog posts here, but with Facebook and Twitter the conversation can be truly and immediately interactive. You talk to us, and you can be sure that we’ll be tweeting back at

Yes, it’s true. A little birdie told us that WriteMyMemoirs has joined the twittersphere and will be tweeting to anyone who’s willing to listen to our 140 characters of wisdom. Like a lot of you, we’re still learning about all of this social media, so please have patience with us.

One goal, of course, is to get our name out there a little more. We’ll be linking to our own website pages and crowing about our services. However, we also will use Twitter to notify our “followers??? about any late-breaking news, contests we may run or observations about pertinent current events. To get into this game, just go to twitter.com, join with your own chosen tweet-worthy name, search for WriteMyMemoirs and press the “follow??? button. We’re also on Facebook, where you can do the same thing—except that you’ll be “friending??? instead of “following.???

For those of you who are internet-conversant enough to be writing your life story online here with us but who prefer not to venture farther than that into the technological wilderness, we understand! When we have something significant to tell you, don’t worry—we’ll email our members with the information, blog about it and, if it’s of high importance, add the information to our home page. Please feel free to comment on the blog posts here, but with Facebook and Twitter the conversation can be truly and immediately interactive. You talk to us, and you can be sure that we’ll be tweeting back at ya!

Cautionary Tale Reminds Everyone to “Sign Up Today!??? for WriteMyMemoirs

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Here at WriteMyMemoirs (WMM), we received a frustrating email recently from someone who could not find any record of memoirs that she had written. Two weeks earlier she had replaced her computer with a newer model. Her work had been saved to that computer’s hard drive, and now she had no access to it. She believed that she also had kept her story on some website or other. Her hope was that the website she’d joined was WMM, although trying to sign in was proving futile.

Our internal investigation showed that she never did sign up with us or write her story here. Perhaps her memoirs are floating out in cyberspace somewhere; who knows? We named our site Write My Memoirs for a reason: it’s easy to remember. Put even just “write memoirs??? into the Google search engine, and our site comes up on the first page. Clearly, the way this emailer found us now to write to us was that the site is so readily traceable and available.

Membership on WMM is free, writing your life story here is free and saving it to your account to keep it safe is also free. We know how much time, energy and commitment it takes to write every page of a memoir, and sometimes you cannot recreate what you have researched and written. We feel so bad for our emailer and urge you to please sign up today so that you do not repeat her mistake and lose your memoirs!

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Then just set up a chapter and start writing your memoir. Don’t worry about rules. There are no rules to writing your memoir; there are only trends. These trends are based on techniques and features identified in current top-selling memoirs. At best, they’re the flavor of the month. If you’re capturing your life in print for your family, for your own gratification or to inspire readers, rather than aiming to set off Hollywood screenplay bidding wars, these trends don’t even apply to you. You’ll write the memoir that suits you best, and it will be timeless, not trend-driven.There are no rules, but there are four steps:

1. Theme/framework
2. Writing
3. Editing/polishing
4. Self-publishing

You’ve researched this, too, and you’ve been shocked at the price for getting help with any one of those steps, much less all four. That’s because most memoir sites promise to commercialize your work. They’ll follow a formula based on current memoir trends, because they want to convince you that they can turn your memoir into a best-seller. These sites overwhelm you with unnecessary information not to help you, the memoir author, but to address Search Engine Optimization (SEO) algorithms so they can sell more.

That’s not what we do at Write My Memoirs. Our small community of coaches, writers and editors are every bit as skilled as any you’ll find, and we charge appropriately for their expertise and the time they’ll spend helping you craft a compelling, enjoyable read. But you won’t pay an upcharge for other websites’ commercialization, the marketing that follows, and the pages of intimidating “advice.” You can sell your book if you like—we have ISBNs available for you—but our organic process of capturing your story takes a noncommercial path.

If you want help with any or all of the four steps above, choose from our services or save money by selecting one of our packages. If you’d like to talk about what’s right for you, schedule a call. One year from now, you can be holding your published memoir in your hand. And at that point, it will be a big deal!

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